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OLD Sneaky #1 samples (progress)

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  • OLD Sneaky #1 samples (progress)

    These pages are from Sneaky #1, drawn in early 2019.



  • #2
    You can definitely tell what’s going on. Nice shot variety, action, consistency.

    Nitpicks, page 1 panel 1, not sure what the backstory is, the creature looks like he’s in pain. Arms don’t connect with the shoulders correctly. The partial toning of the mountains and sky make it hard for the eye to read the depth as it looks like it’s not finished.

    Page two last panel, I think that broken leg should be flopping in the wind a little more.

    Last page, second panel, I think the speedlines should be breaking up the black inks a little more.

    The last panel looks a little flat, and two panels ago he was crushed just under the ribs and in the last panel he is crushed at the pelvis. And the monster fingers don’t match. The print doesn’t show the finger that was to the left.

    These small connection details kick the viewer subconsciously out of the hypnotizing part of following a comic story.

    From a character design, except for the masks, it was hard to tell the two apart. And that monster should be scarier.

    Done stepping on your neck. Great storytelling and shot variety and pacing and page variety.
    StorytellingThrdhttp://www.penciljack.com/forum/show...threadid=31180
    https://www.youtube.com/user/eddiechinglives
    https://eddiechinglives.deviantart.com

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    • #3
      Really appreciate these great notes EddieChingLives!
      I'll take this with me when I edit future issues.

      Comment


      • #4
        Fresh my overall advice would be to push the values more. The main characters are black and white but everything else is pretty much is rendered in a relatively light range of greys. Making the darks darker will help push the depth and make the figures stand out more. Also it can make things more dramatic. The panel where Sneaky is in the shadow of the yeti's claw for example. It tells me what's going on. But if that shadow was very dark and engulfing him, it would read more as danger.
        sketchbook thread

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        • #5



          l did a quick little draw over of battle wraiths advice as l think it would be a great way to kick the pages up a notch without having to Redraw ! I'd also recommend using of blambots free fonts , a professional font can really make a page look ten times better! well done on this man!
          e
          http://barcsdoodles.blogspot.ie/

          https://www.tumblr.com/blog/eoinb

          @barcswow on twitter and instagram

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          • #6
            Thanks I see how bleached looking it was before. I think I do have the strength to fix values and fonts. The thought of redraw right now... oof!
            much appreciated everyone!

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            • #7
              I don't ink very well among other things, but I really wanted to see what different effect it will have if inking was done differently than your sketchy/paintery approach. Was good and fun inking quickie and I concluded each has its own unique feeling.



              Last edited by humble-tomato; 01-23-2021, 08:54 PM.

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              • #9
                This thread is getting ridiculous!

                I revived it just because neither got no replies and look at everybody.

                Re-toned! Re-inked! So cool. I had to chime in too.

                I applied the blacks from crazyjedichicken and lowered the opacity.

                Page 1

                I toned some of the speedlines.

                I added some hi lights to the figure in shadow on the first page to make him pop out of the shadow. Toned some of the twigs to make them not seem so flat.

                Page 2

                I tried to add some white to the speedlines, but the random angles of the speedlines kind of don’t look right.

                Page 3

                You can’t tell but I tried toning some shadow on the figure n the first panel.

                Speedlines look a bit more consistent direction. Unity. Attempted to add white to the impact effect,

                The last panel I tried to line up the footprint with the previous panel.

                Was fun.

                Don’t worry about redrawing everything. Draw. Get feedback. Learn. Move on.

                I think Art Spiegalmen had a quote to the effect that if he’s done with the book and went back to redraw everything since he got better, at the end of that pass, he’d have to go back again because he got even better.

                StorytellingThrdhttp://www.penciljack.com/forum/show...threadid=31180
                https://www.youtube.com/user/eddiechinglives
                https://eddiechinglives.deviantart.com

                Comment


                • #10
                  Wow people its beautiful to have this engagement and input.
                  Humble-tomato this is awesome! Your ink style did improve some elements and its fascinating to see the effect inkers can have.

                  EddieChingLives so cool, your edits refined it for sure.
                  I feel that quote, like a black hole or snake eating its tail.
                  I will do final edits but not redraw.
                  Thanks ppl!

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