Hal Jordan: Fear Itself

[jsalwen]

Just having some fun.

[jsalwen]

Here it is without color elements.

[lost-spartan]

His neck is too wide, his ears looks almost non-exsistent as we should definitely be able to see more of the left ear at this angle, and the hands are different sizes. The bg is really busy, and I think a little Kirby krackle would have gone a long way to sell more of an eminating space energy kind of vibe to it. I like the rest, good work.

[jsalwen]

I pretty much agree with all the crits, but the neck thing. I purposely made it wide in a McGuinness kind of way. I know it's wide, but it was intended.

As for the bg, I LOVE Kirby crackles, but I use them a lot. I was going for dark tendrils coming for Hal, so I like the busy effect.

Do you really think the bg is too busy? The piece is kind of simple, and I figured a busy background would inject a little more movement.

[PLOG]

I'll agree with pretty much all of what Spartan said, though i don't mind the Bg too terribly much. Though i think in your colored version you might want the gradiant to not affect the figure so much, that'd give you a bit more separation. Meh, it's an idea.

Aside from previously mentioned issues, he's pretty short in the hips. The distance from his lower abs to his "package" is very narrow. It actually wouldn't be that bad if his abs became a little less defined as they went down. But since they're all very rendered the space looks off.

not bad though keep up the good work.

mattPLOG

[Bruce]

I know it's wide, but it was intended.

Doesn't mean it works. First rule of anything is learn the rules before breaking them.

It really throws his head off and makes it odd to look at.

The BG is to busy because the blacks fight the figure. There is no depth to the image.
You look like you can go far though. I look forward to seeing more.

[TNTales]

Maybe this is too much but I notice that the abs have a lot of definition while there's less definition in the arms, waist and legs. I didn't know if it's a style thing. I've gotten a couple of books on anatomy and I'm starting to see differences between anatomy and art.

So this is more of a question than a quit.

[penabled]

Aside from the previous crits.....that six-pack extends too far down and is too bulging to look as though they are part of the same body. His head is too small for his body.

[jsalwen]

Thanks for the crits, fellas. I will definitely keep them in mind. This was more of an experiment where I was pushing the cartoony aspect a lot (probably too much).

Still, it's fun to experiment. I'll tone down the cartoon aspects a bit in future pieces.

[Wo-Nellie]

It's a good picture. I second all the criticisms that have been waged at it though, especially the six-pack which I would've mentioned if no one else had.
I'll add one criticism, but it's really nothing. On his lower jaw, the way cross-hatching has been used gives it the appearance of facial hair; while this certainly isn't impossible for G.L. to have it would be exceedingly rare.

[PLOG]

I know time doesn't allways allow for it, but don't hesitate to throw things on the works in progress bench. Get some crits before you lay the inks down, i've found it helpful and soothing like a small asian woman walking on your back.

mattPLOG

[jsalwen]

Thanks, PLOg.

I'm usually much too impatient for that. If I get flowing on a piece, I just tend to keep working until it's finished. I usually can't stop myself.