Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Official Commie Zombie Thread

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • fatmancomics
    started a topic Official Commie Zombie Thread

    Official Commie Zombie Thread

    Alright folks, here it is, the official Brokenhill's Commie Zombies From Outer Space Thread.

    In here you will be able to see the (slow) process of this great community project. If you want to contribute, please send me a PM with what you are willing to do. We need pencilers, inkers, colorists and letterers. Just a few things to remember:

    1. If you can't do at least three pages of sequentials, please don't volunteer to do them. Anything less than three pages of consistant art is really bad for continuity. This goes for everyone. If you want to do a pin-up, that's cool but you're not beefing up your sequential portfolio with anything less than three pages anyway.

    2. You have a total of two weeks for three pages. Be honest with yourself and with me. If you can't do it in two weeks, don't volunteer.

    3. Pencilers: Thumbnails are due three days after you have signed up. After your thumbnails have been greenlit, that leaves you 9 days to finish the pages. There may be some adjustments to make before they are greenlit and that's why I'm giving it the 2 week window. If you ink and color your art yourself I can give you a few extra days but no more than three.

    I will be posting scripts as soon as I write them down. In the meantime, the description of the story, the character guide sheets and the art so far are as follows:
    Last edited by fatmancomics; 01-16-2011, 11:07 PM.

  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Pg 21: Splash page that looks extremely similar to issue one, Pg. 6. Mecha Jarhead is standing over the mecha CZ that was swept before and shooting it in the head with the laser canon. The headless bodies of the other CZs can be seen in the background, one with a melted clump where its head used to be and the other with the head completely blown off, burn marks around the throat hole.

    Mecha Jarhead: (in square balloon) and that's how it's done...

    SFX: PH-CHOOM!

    Page 22: Splash with two inlays.

    Inlay 1: Full shot from behind mecha Jarhead. We see for the first time that he is in the hangar where our heroes were given their mecha. Mecha Jarhead is looking up towards a row of tinted windows, clearly a command cneter.

    Fatman: (from inside the windows in "electrical" balloon to show it's coming from speakers) Very good. But now you need a round with a team...

    Inlay 2: Two hangar doors are opening from one of the walls.

    SFX: SH-RRMM!

    Splash: Five female mecha are standing in teh open hangar doorway. They are clearly mecha versions of the Hell's Belles and they are also clearly transformed versions of their planes. There must be no propellers though as they will have upgraded to jets by now.

    Pg 23: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of mecha Jarhead in contra posto.

    Jarhead: (in square balloon) Not my usual team, but I guess they'll have to do. Try to keep up, ladies.

    Panel 2: Bird's eye view of all the mechas in defensive stances as doors around the hangars open and CZ mechas run out of them. Not every door should be opened at the same time and more than one CZ will be coming out of the doorways.

    SFX: (near the doors) SH-RRM!

    SFX: (from the mecha CZ running towards our heroes) SKREEE!

    Panel 3: Half shot of mecha Jarhead punching a mecha CZ.

    Jarhead: Jesus, Fatman! How many of these things have you built?!

    SFX: (near the punch) KLANK!

    Panel 4: Shot of the inside of the control room. The Fatman is leaning over a control panel and speaking into a microphone. The control panel should have screens that show vitals of both the CZ and Hero mechas.

    Fatman: Twenty. And don't think it's easy rebuilding them after you destroy them!

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Pg 18: 5 Panels

    Panel 1: Wide shot of the cosmonaut rockets landing at the Kremlin.

    Zomba: When ten years had passed and they still showed no sign of infection, we sent the cosmonauts ahead to herald our arrival.

    Panel 2: Same shot as panel 1 but this time there is a zombie UFO in front of the rockets and several UFOs in the sky behind them.

    Zomba: Imagine our surprise upon finding out that capitalism had all but stamped out communism in your world.

    Panel 3: shot of the New York city skyline. Make sure to include the statue of liberty.

    Zomba: Much like our planet, you had your cities of enlightenment, populated by worshipers of individuality...

    Panel 4: Montage of religious symbols. Include the cross, star of David, Muslim moon, Buddha, etc.

    Zomba: And your theocracies squabbling over whose culture was holier. We couldn't allow you to destroy yourselves like we had done.

    Panel 5: Close-up shot of the words "in God We Trust" on a dollar bill.

    Zomba: Even you capitalists, who claimed to separate your government and your church couldn't hide your hipocracy.

    Page 19: 5 Panels

    Panel 1: Close-up shot of the zomba's face from the front.

    Zomba: That is why we took over.

    Panel 2: Close-up shot of Drifter's face from teh front.

    Drifter: You know what's missing from your story? Permission!

    Panel 3: Same shot as panel 2 but Drifter is now clearly agitated.

    Drifter: Who the **** ever asked you and your kind for help?! From what I hear, even the Cubans refused to join your so-called crusade!

    Panel 4: Same shot as Panel 3

    Drifter: Quit the bullshit, Lady! You took over because you depleted the food sources on your planet and saw a buffet when the cosmonauts landed. If you're really here to help, why do you kill and eat us?!

    Panel 5: Same shot as panel 1 but the zomba is now smiling.

    Zomba: You're not as stupid as you look. It's a shame I won't get to taste your brain...

    Page 20: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Front close-up shot of Jarhead. He is screaming.

    Jarhead: GET SOME!

    Panel 2: Wide shot of mecha Jarhead decapitating a mecha CZ with his bare hands. Three other mecha CZ are around him, two firing their eye lasers (and missing) while the third has his mouth open, steam coming out it.

    SFX: (near the mecha CZ's head as it is pulled off) KKRRLCHECK!!

    Panel 3: Same wide shot as Panel 2. This time mecha Jarhead is sweeping the mecha cz that was getting ready to spew acid off its feet with a kick. The mecha CZ is spewing the acid in mid air but it looks like the acid will land on one of the mecha CZs that is firing the lasers.

    SFX: (near the kick) CLANK!

    SFX: (near the acid) HSSS!

    Panel 4: Same wide shot as before. This time the acid is landing on the head of one of the CZs that was firing the lasers. The CZ that was swept is now lying on its back and mecha Jarhead, still kneeling, is shooting the other CZ in the head with a laser canon that came out of mecha Jarhead's forearm (it can be shown beginning to come out in the previous panel).

    SFX: (near the acid) TSSS!

    SFX: (near the CZ on its back) CLONK!

    SFX: (near the laser canon) P-CHOOM!

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    PG 14: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Elevated 3/4 view of the three cosmonauts meeting with the Zombas. The head cosmonaut has removed his helmet and it is in his hands. The Zombas are grouped around them and the one closest to the cosmonaut without a helmet is extending her hand towards him.

    Zomba: Those heroic human men chose to ignore our quarantine warnings and risked their lives for their mission.

    Panel 2: Same shot as Panel 1 but the head cosmonaut is now shaking hands with the Zomba and the other two cosmonauts are removing their helmets. Have one cosmonaut holding his helmet above his head and the other with the helmet still on but both hands on it.

    Zomba: Once it was clear that they could survive in our environment...

    Panel 3: Same shot as previous 2 panels but the zomba has pulled the head cosmonaut towards her and is biting his neck. The other 2 cosmonauts are reeling back in horror. The one that has already removed his helmet is now dropping it. The other zombas should also look like they are ready to pounce.

    Zomba: We welcomed them with open arms.

    Panel 4: Same angle shot. This time the entire group of zombas is attacking the cosmonauts. Two of the cosmonauts are no longer visible underneath the feeding frenzy. Only the one who still has his helmet on is partly visible, one arm outstretched towards the sky.

    Zomba: Understandably, our women were exited to see live males of a species so similar to our own...

    Page 15: 3 Panels

    Panel 1: Straight shot of the helmeted cosmonaut breaking free of the group. There should be lots of arms and hands holding onto his suit, which is now tattered. There should be bite marks on the visible parts of his arms and legs.

    Zomba: (in caption)... before introducing them to our leaders.

    Panel 3: Perspective wide shot of the field. In the foreground lies the body of one of the cosmonauts. His suit is tattered, large parts of it missing where the zombas tore it off to eat his innards, which are missing. His head has been cracked open and hollowed out. The parts of his face that still have flesh on them have bite marks. On his shoulder is a patch with the hammer and cycle logo with the letters "CCCP" below it. In the middle background lies the second cosmonaut, in similar condition and with one or two zombas still feasting on his entrails. In the far background, the surviving cosmonaut is being carried away from the viewer by two commie zombies (still missing the spikes) who are each holding him by his upper arms. Floating above and ahead of them is the leader zomba on her flying platform.

    Zomba: (in caption) In his infinite wisdom, the commanding cosmonaut managed to request that his subordinates stay with their rockets while he met with our leaders.

    Page 16 and 17: 2 page splash. The surviving cosmonaut is strapped onto a rack. The top of his head is missing, his brain exposed and there are many wires coming out of it. It should be evident that the wires have been inserted into his brain so they should have spikes on the tips and the spikes should be halfway into the cosmonaut's brain. The rest of the room is filled with holographic images of Earth. There should be mostly Russian communist symbols. Show the Kremlin, Marx, Stalin, The hammer cycle, the USSR flag, Sputnik, the communist moon probe, the rockets that they flew to the zombie planet. The room must still be shown in the background and there need to be lots of wires coming from the machine the cosmonaut is strapped to. There should also be scientists here and there monitoring the machine, monitoring the cosmonaut, taking notes on the images seen.

    Zomba: With our advanced technology, we soon found a way to communicate with the cosmonaut...

    New caption: ...and learned of the glory of the communist system.

    New caption: A system that recognizes the dangers that individual freedoms place upon the populace.

    New caption: A system that recognizes the promise of each member of society and forces them to reach their full potential by placing them where they can do the most good.

    New caption: Our faith in individuality and the belief that each person can reach their full potential was our undoing. Had we developed such a system on our planet, this would not have been so.

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Page11: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of an amphitheater style lecture hall. The place is rather empty and there are areas where small groups of women sit together. On the stage is another small group of women. All are seated with tablet style devices on their laps except for one. She is pointing at a holographic projection of a dissected zombie.
    The zombie can be shown to the side, in profile, with a device like a camera in front of it or behind the group on stage but it must be visible, restrained, and it must be clear that its insides have been opened and that it is still alive. Its brain can be exposed as well.

    Zomba: Our scientists discovered that the virus had mutated the reanimated cadavers in order to survive. Their nervous systems now operated completely on their own. The brain was used for little more than motor functions....


    Panel 2: Bust shot of a zombie biting on the neck of a screaming woman.

    Zomba: But it still needed blood for oxygenation. Hence the hunger.

    Panel 3: Shot of an assembly line of Commie Zombie suits. The ones in the front of the line have zombies inside them and the ones in back are empty. The empty group should have zombies being held above them by a crane able to hold multiple zombies (at least 4). The zombies must be missing their arms and legs. Remember, this is before the cosmonauts arrived so no commie symbols on the suits.

    Zomba: Our men were now ravenous beasts. They were dangerous but we could not destroy them. Doing so would doom us to certain extinction. So we cut off their limbs and put them into cryogenic suits that could be controlled remotely.

    Panel 4: 3/4 shot of a zombie in its suit. The focus here is the tank on the side of the suit. There is a technician filling the blood tank via a clear hose hooked up to a drum filled with blood.

    Zomba: We began feeding the blood directly into their brains intravenously. The beasts were no longer a threat but we had a greater enemy to contend with...



    Page 12: 6 panels

    Panel 1: Close-up shot of the same technician as panel 4 on previous page. Her full figure should be shown but we must see her face. It is full of wrinkles and her hair is grey. She should look tired and sad.

    Zomba: Time. Without a cure and without men, our race was becoming extinct.

    Panel 2: Shot of a line of women being inoculated, army recruit style. The line can be done in perspective or as a straight forward shot but it must be clear that the woman at the head of the line is being injected with a syringe by the doctors.

    Zomba: our scientists discovered that the men had become beasts because their brains had been dead for too long. If injected before the brain died, the virus kept us alive beyond the death of our bodies.

    Panel 3: Same shot as panel 2 but now the line is full of the women wearing the Zomba suits. Their skin and eyes are now pale and their hair looks dull. They shouldn't all be young but the majority should.

    Zomba: We used our technology to keep our bodies from decomposing...

    Panel 4: front shot of a Zomba, complete with new suit, crouched over a dead simian body. She is devouring its innards.

    Zomba: But we could no longer regenerate dead cells so our intelligence only lasted for so long before we turned into beasts as well.

    Panel 5: Shot of a group of scientists in front of a holographic display full of equations and anatomical charts (x-ray style) of heads and brains.

    Zomba: Our scientists developed a method for our bodies to regenerate our brains but it required that we replace the dead matter.

    Panel 6: Same as panel 4 but now the Zomba is holding up the simian's head. The skull has been cracked open and she is devouring the brain through the orifice.

    Zomba: this meant that our hunger was now not just for blood but for live brains as well.

    Page 13: 3 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of a field littered with simian corpses. There are several Zombas crouching over cadavers and eating their brains.

    Zomba: There were only certain animals on our planet that were genetically similar to us and we were devouring the faster than they could replenish themselves.

    Panel 2: Same shot as above but now there are two cosmonaut rockets in the sky, plummeting towards the ground. All the Zombas that were feasting are now looking up at the rockets but they are still crouched.

    Zomba: Our resources were becoming scarce when our saviors arrived...

    Panel 3: Shot of the crash site. Both rockets are completely destroyed. There are two cosmonauts in the doorway of the rocket in the foreground and one already outside, ahead of them.

    Zomba: The Cosmonauts.

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Page 5: 4 panels

    Panel 1: Shot of a Times Square type area. The biggest screen has a shot of a battle going on in the land the Zomba speaks of. There should be lots of violence and blood on the screen with alien type on the bottom of the screen a la "CNN". There should be a crowd watching this.

    Zomba: The rest of us watched but never intervened. We felt that tolerance was the best way to prove how enlightened we had become.

    Panel 2: Shot of a suicide bomber with explosives strapped to his chest, screaming as he is pressing the button on the detonator. This is also seen from a screen with the proper script on the bottom to show that it is a news cast.

    Zomba: We kept them at bay through treaties and embargoes that impeded them from creating weapons of mass destruction. If one of them decided to kill a crowd via suicide, we didn't care as long as we were not directly affected.

    Panel 3: Shot of a group of doctors inside a clean room, surrounding a patient. The machinery must look very advanced but it must still be clear that they are medical machines. The patient must look extremely sick. He must be pale and covered in boils, fluid oozing out of his eyes, nose and mouth.

    Zomba: Nobody knows which side struck first but we soon found out their weapon of choice. I believe you humans call it germ warfare.

    Panel 4: Shot of a desert with dead bodies strewn everywhere, all male. The bodies are of the two sects. The more bodies the better but the desert must be visible.

    Zomba: By the time the rest of us realized what happened, they had eradicated each other.

    Page 6: Five panels

    Panel 1: Same shot as panel 5 but now with women crying over the bodies of their men. Veils are okay but do not make their wardrobe overtly middle eastern (no burkas).

    Zomba: The virus was designed to make the men sterile but mutated, becoming both airborne and lethal. Their women mourned them...

    Panel 2: Same shot but now the women have picked up the men's weapons and are firing at one another. Women being shot must be shown on both sides.

    Zomba: and then took up arms to avenge them.

    Panel 3: Profile shot of a woman from either sect with a bag and two little girls at a guard station. She is handing the male guard a handful of coins.

    Zomba: Those who tired of the fighting sneaked past their borders to begin anew, not knowing they were dooming us all.

    Panel 4: Same shot as panel 3 as far as the male and female figure but this time the woman is placing a ring on the finger of the man in front of a priest. She is marrying a new man in her new country. It must be clear that this is a wedding so the priest must wear the same kind of garb as either of the leaders on panel 5 of page 3.

    Zomba: You see, the women were not affected but they were carriers of the virus.

    Panel 5: Shot of a woman with graying hair on a chair next a bed. Her head is slumped into her hands as she cries. In the bed lies her dead husband, his hand on the nightstand where we can see a large picture frame. The picture frame is the shot of them from panel 4. The man is in the same condition as "patient zero" from page 5, panel 3.

    Zomba: The virus took nine earth years to incubate and only manifested iself on the tenth. By then it was too late.

    Page 7: 2 panels

    Panel 1: Composite shot of scientists at their microscopes, mixing beakers, injecting (alien) rodents, treating the sick.

    Zomba: It took us thrity earth years to realize what had happened. Our scientists and doctors worked feverishly to find a cure.

    Panel 2: Composite shot of world leaders at podiums, making announcements with images of the dead and dying mixed in.

    Zomba: Our world leaders quarantined the entire planet. Afraid of infecting any other races, they forbade space travel and sent warning broadcasts into space in every one of our languages. They even transmitted images of the dead and dying.


    Page 8: 4 panels

    Panel 1: Shot of a vile with a glowing, orange liquid inside.

    Zomba: Eighty years after the release of the virus, a cure was found...

    Panel 2: Shot of a group of female scientists standing around the vile on a table. They are not celebrating. They are not even smiling.

    Zomba: But it was too late. The men were all dead.

    Panel 3: Bird's eye shot of an enormous hangar filled with rows upon rows of cryogenic tanks. Inside are the cadavers of the infected men.

    Zomba: Of all our cultures, none ever buried their dead. We only started keeping the cadavers of the men the virus killed in order to find a cure. We had no clean materials with which to clone new men.

    Panel 4: Bird's eye shot of a commie zombie on a table surrounded by scientists (all female). His back arched, hands outstretched skywards and contorted, he is being re-animated. There should be tubes inserted throughout his body. Off to the side, a Commie Zombie suit should be visible. The arms and legs should be different and there should be no "spikes" because this is an early design.

    Zomba: Our race was dying and we were desperate to survive. So much so that our scientists began reanimating the dead to try to cure them.

    Pages 9 and 10: Splash with inset panel.

    Inset panel: Same shot as pg 8 panel 4 but this time all the scientists are dead and disemboweled. The zombie is crouching over one of the bodies, eating its organs.

    Zomba: but it wasn't the men that were being reanimated. It was the virus and the reanimation process had mutated it yet again.

    Splash: Shot of the "Times Square" area from previous pages. It is pandemonium. There are crowds of women being attacked by zombies. Lots of carnage should be shown. Women are being bitten, some are already dead on the ground and being devoured. Be as detailed as possible but still show the city.

    Zomba: Nothing of the men remained in the the cadavers. The reanimated bodies were but vessels for the virus and the virus had developed and unrelenting hunger. (new caption) our population, which had been cut in half already, was halved yet again by these beasts.
    Last edited by fatmancomics; 12-09-2015, 12:17 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Issue 3


    Page 1: 6 Panels

    Panel 1: Headshoto of a Commie Zomba looking straight ahead.

    Panel 2: Black

    Panel 3: Same as Panel 1.

    Panel 4: Same head shot of the Zomba. She speaks.

    Zomba: Good, you are awake.

    Panel 5: Profile shot of Drifter's face. It HAS to be a tight shot. His head and chin can be shown but aren't necessary.

    Drifter: I thought you kunts only spoke Russian.

    Panel 6: Provile shot of the Zomba in front of Drifter, also in profile. Again, a tight shot of only their heads.

    Zomba: I see manners are not part of your capitalist culture.

    Page 2: 4 panels

    Panel 1: Front, close-up shot of Drifter's face. He has a slight smirk.

    Drifter: If I say, "pretty please" will you leave my planet?

    Panel 2: Shot of the Zomba laughing. I can be a bust shot but no bigger.

    Zomba: HA, HA, HA! Humor in the face of adversity. The sign of a true warrior. A shame you fight for the wrong side.

    Panel 3: Profile shot of Drifter's face. Tight again.

    Drifter: History will prove you wrong.

    Panel 4: Full body shot of the Commie Zomba. She is riding on a flying platform and the background is a shot of the Cmmie Zombie home planet from space. The Zomba looks down, saddened, as she speaks.

    Zomba: I'm afraid, little one, that my planet's history has already proved me right...

    Page 3: 5 panels

    Panel 1: Shot of the CZ home plante, still from space but close than before. It is blue and cloudy like Earth but has three moons and the continents are obviously different.

    Zomba: (in caption box) Our planet was once very much like yours. Lush and full of life, it had many countries, cultures and religions...

    Panel 2: shot of different houses of worship, each with elaborately decorative architecture. Think Indian, Chinese and Mayan temples. DO NOT use crosses, Bhuddas or any other Earthly religious symbol.

    Zomba: (in caption box) At first, these religions were the greatest dividers of our people.

    Panel 3: Shot of scientists performing experiments. The outfits can be tweaked to appear alien but it must still be obvious that these are scientists.

    Zomba: (still in caption) As our intellects evolved, most of us moved beyond theocracies and developed systems of government that were democratic in nature.

    Panel 4: shot of different religious leaders at their pulpits. They can be made to look different through clothing and backgrounds. Each leader is speaking fervently and passionately.

    Zomba: Logic had replaced faith and, without religious wars, we thrived. But religion had not been eradicated and zealots were still abundant.

    Panel 5: Shot of two different religious leaders in profile, screaming. Their garb should be very similar but still have subtle differences. NO TURBANS

    Zomba: Two such zealots were especially dangerous because they preached hatred and intolerance towards anyone who didn't practice their beliefs.

    Page 4: 3 panels

    Panel 1: Shot of a city among a wilderness. It should be built out of stone with structures similar to Earth desert cities.

    Zomba: the tragedy was that both these leaders practiced different variation of the same religion and each had laid claim to the land from where it sprung.

    Panel 2: Shot of the same city but it now lays mostly in ruin and land is ravaged.

    Zomba: For millennia these two sects fought savagely over land whose value was purely sentimental...

    Panel 3: Same city but the land is now a desert and the structures are all in ruin. The people of the city live in tents among the ruins.

    Zomba: Since they had long ago turned what was once a wonderful civilization into a desert covered in sand made from the ground up bones of the dead.
    Last edited by fatmancomics; 12-08-2015, 08:14 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Pg 22: 6 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of Jarhead inside his cockpit. He is slamming buttons left and right in a panic.

    Jarhead: Goddamnit! Nothing's responding!

    SFX: CLICK! CLACK! CLECK!

    Panel 2: Shot of Drifter and the CZ mecah he is battling. Drifter's head is melted almost down to his neck and the CZ mecha is spewing acid onto mecha Drifter's left shoulder.

    SFX: PSSHH!

    Drifter: I'm not doing so good over here big brother! Talk to me!

    Panel 3: Shot from inside Jarhead's vehicle. The entire cockpit is lit in red thanks to the CZ mecha's laser, which is still firing. Jarhead is sweating profusely as he yells.

    Jarhead: This thing's not letting up and my controls are all dead! If you can still hear me, your orders are to cut and run!

    Panel 4: Shot of mecha Drifter pulling the CZ mecah down with his good arm and kneeing the CZ mecah in the stomach.

    Drifter: No can do, sergeant! No man left behind, remember?

    Panel 5: Shot of mecha Drifter grabbing the head of the CZ mecha that is firing lasers onto Jarhead. The CZ mecha that took the knee to the gut is kneeling in the background.

    Drifter: Leave my brother alone you son of a bitch!

    Panel 6: Shot of Drifter mecha pulling off the head of the CZ mecha he just grabbed. The head should not come clean off. Instead there shuold be lots of exposed wires and piping coming out of the neck of the cz mecah.

    SFX: KRLACK!

    CZ mecha: SCREEE!

    PG 23: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of Drifter inside his cockpit looking at his panel.

    Drifter: Come on, Fatman. You loved those damn cartoons too much not to have given this thing some lasers!

    Panel 2: Close-up of a button on Drifter's panel labeled "photoatomic beam".

    Drifter: There!

    Panel 3: Close-up of Drifter's hand slamming the button.

    Drifter: Why can't you just call them "lasers" like everyone else you fat f----?!

    SFX: CLACK!

    Panel 4: Shot of Drifter mecha's melted head, sparks coming out of it where the used to be.

    SFX: CRACKLE! CRACKLE!

    Drifter: Damnit! You cliche'd turd! You HAD to put them in the eyes!

    Page 24: 5 panels

    Panel 1: Shot of Jarhead standing on top of his downed vehicle, waving at Drifter.

    Jarhead: Forget it, Bro! Let's get the hell out of here while we can!

    Panel 2: Shot of mecha Drifter kneeling to pick up Jarhead with the hand it has left.

    Drifter: Copy that!

    Panel 3: Shot of Jarhead hopping onto mecha Drifter's hand.

    Drifer: You're going to have to hang on tight-

    Panel 4: Wide shot of mecha Drifter getting blasted with lasers by the CZ mecha he had kneed before. Jarhead is falling out of his hand.

    SFX: ZZZAPP!

    Drifter: GAH!

    Panel 5: Mecha Drifter is still kneeling on the ground but is hovering over Jarhead, using his arm as support. The mecha is shielding Jarhead from the lasers.

    Drifter: Get out of here, Bro! You can still make it!

    Page 25: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Wide shot of mecha Drifter being kicked in it's melted face by the CZ mecha with the dislodged head. Jarhead should still be seen in the shot. The force of the kick is throwing mecha Drifter backwards.

    SFX: CLANK!

    Panel 2: Shot of Jarhead screaming up at his brother, one hand outstreched towards him.

    Jarhead: Jhonny, look out!

    Panel 3: Mecha Drifter is now being held by the CZ mecha that was blasting him with lasers earlier, half-nelson style.

    Panel 4: The CZ mecha with dislodged head is now pounding on the chest of Drifter mecha.

    SFX: SPLANG! SPLONG!

    Page 26: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Close-up of the CZ mecha with dislodged head's hand. The tips of the fingers come to sharp points like claws.

    Panel 2: Shot of the same CZ mecha thrusting its hand into mecha Drifter's chest, piercing the metal.

    SFX: SCHRAP!

    Panel 3: Same as panel 2 but this time the CZ mecha is thrusting its other hand into mecha Drifter's chest.

    SFX: SCHRREPP!

    Panel 4: The CZ mecha is now spreading the metal apart, revealing Drifter inside his cockpit.

    SFX: SCHRRREEE!

    Pg 27: 5 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of Drifter inside of the exposed cockpit seen from teh outside. He is standing, firing his dies arm at the CZ mecha.

    Drifter: You're not getting me that easily, f---ker!

    SFX: PKOW! PKOW! PKOW!

    Panel 2: Shot of the CZ mecha's hand grabbing Drifter. Drifter is still firing his side arm while struggling with his free hand.

    SFX: PKOW! PKOW! PKOW!

    Panel 3: Shot of Jarhead shooting his side arm up at the CZ mecha that has just taken his brother. He is yelling in desperation.

    Jarhead: LET HIM GO!

    SFX: PKOW! PKOW! PKOW!

    Panel 4: Shot of the CZ mecha that had mecha Drifter in a half nelson letting go of mecha Drifter and letting it fall. The CZ mecha that grabbed Drifter is now walking away with is hostage.

    Panel 5: Shot of the CZ without a hostage bending down to pick up Jarhead. Jarhead must be visible in this panel.

    Jarhead: (in thought ballon) That's right, shithead! You take my little brother, you take me!

    Page 28: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Same shot as panel 5 in previous page but this time the CZ mecha's head is exploding as it is hit by a missile from off panel.

    SFX: SSHHCHOOM!

    Panels 2 & 3: Side by side shots of Jarhead and the CZ mecha that has Drifter as they turn to see where the missile came from.

    Panel 4: Shot of 5 WWII Mustand planes. Each plane has the name "Hell's Belles" on it's side along a "coop" drawing of two devil girls being "friendly" with each other.

    Center Plane: One down one to go, Belles!

    Page 29: 6 Panels

    Panel 1: Bust shot of Jarhead yelling at the Hell's Belles (into is earpiece).

    Jarhead: Cease fire! That thing has my brother goddamnit!

    Panel 2: shot of the CZ mecha gearing up to jump from the back.

    Panel 3: Same shot as panel 2 but the CZ mecha's back is opening up and forming a type of jetpack.

    SFX: WHRRR!

    Panel 4: Shot of the CZ mecha jumping into the air, the jetpack igniting.

    Panel 5: Shot of the CZ mecha whizzing past the Hell's Belles' planes.

    SFX: FFWOOSH!

    Panel 6: Shot of Dorothy from inside the cockpit of her mustang, looking back towards the CZ mecha that just outmatched them.

    Dorothy: Damnit! We'll never catch that thing!

    Page 30: Splash page of Jarhead. He looks itense and his eyes are teary at the loss of his brother.

    Jarhead: It's alright ladies, I'll find him. And when I do it will be the end of the Commie Zombie Regime!

    Leave a comment:


  • brokenhill
    replied
    Still loving the pages!

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Page 19: 5 Panels

    Panel 1: Same shot as Pg. 18, Panel 5 but Drifter's mecha, fully formed, stands between the CZ mechas.

    Drifer: Get some!

    Panel 2: Waist high shot of Drifter's mecha punching a CZ mecha to the left.

    SFX: CLANK!

    Drifter: I'll be done here in a second, Bro!

    Panle 3: Waist high shot of Drifter's mecha punching the other CZ mecha to the right. The first CZ mecha is still reeling backwards from the first blow.

    SFX: CLENK!

    Jarhead: Damnit, Drifter get out of the way so I can fire on them!

    Panel 4: Close up shot of mecha Drifter's arm as it swings for a third punch. Add speed lines for drama.

    Drifter: No need for that, Bro! I'll turn these things into scrap metal before you can say-!

    Panel 5: Close-up shot of mecha Drifter's fist being caught by one of the CZ mecha's hand.

    SFX: BONG!

    Drifter: Oh, shit!

    Pg. 20: 6 Panels

    Panel 1: Close-up shot of Jarhead looking up at the fight. He is screaming.

    Jarhead: NO!

    Panel 2: Close-up shot of Jarhead's hand slamming the transformation button on his panel.

    Jarhead: Hang on, little brother!

    SFX: TEK

    Panel 3: Full shot of the entire scene. Drifter's mecha has both its hands clasped by one of the CZ mechas now, WWE style. Drifter's vehicle is beginning its transformation.

    SFX: (By Jarhead's vehicle) WHRR! CLACK!...

    Panel 4: (Inset into panel 6) Close-up shot of the second CZ mecha turning its hea. It has taken notice of Jarhead's vehicle transforming.

    Panel 5: (Inset into panel 6) Same shot as Panel 4 but the CZ mecha's eyes are not glowing red.

    Panel 6: same shot as Panel 3. Drifter mecha is still struggling with the CZ mecha in the background and jarhead's vehicle, midway through transforming, is taking a direct hit from lasers that are being fired from teh other CZ mecha's eyes.

    SFX: FFSHOOM!

    Jarhead: GAH!

    PG 21: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Half splas of jarhead's half transformed mecha still being blasted by the CZ mecha's eye lasers. Jarhead's mecha is on the ground with the CZ mecha towering over him.

    Panel 2: (Inset into panel 3) Close-up of the CZ mecha's face that drifter is dealing with, its mouth opening wide. Steam is coming out of its mouth.

    SFX: HSSS!

    Panel 3: Waist high half splash of Drifter's mecha nad th eCZ mecha it is fighting. The CZ mecha is spewing acid from its mouth onto Drifter mecha's face.

    SFX: PSSHH!

    Drifter: -THE ****?!

    Panel 4: (inset into panel 3) Close-up shot of drifter mecha's head in the process of melting.

    SFX: FFZZZ!

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Page 16: 5 Panels


    Panel 1: Shot of a cloud of smoke where the CZ mecah can be seen inside the cloud, its eyes glowing.

    Panel 2: shot of Jarhead from inside his vehicle.

    Jarhead: No time to celbrate, Bro! There's still one after us! Let's see if I can make him join his partner!

    Panel 3: shoto f rocket launchers from the sides of Jarhead's vehicle. They must look different than Drifter's so the vehicles can be told apart. Multiple missiles are fired.

    SFX: Choom! Choom! Choom! Choom!

    Panel 4: Shot of the second CZ mecha being hit by Jarhead's missiles.

    Panel 5: Jarhead looks back at his handywork. There should be a slight smile on his face but nothing as celebratory as the earlier shot of Drifter.

    Jarhead: Alright!


    Page 17: 4 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of a cloud of smoke where the two CZ mechas went down. This time two silhouettes can be seen, each with a aset of glowing eyes.

    Panel 2: Shot of the CZ mechas jumping out of the thick smoke.

    SFX: (Next to each of the CZ mecha) SCREE! SCREE!

    Panel 3: Shot of Jarhead from inside his vehicle. He is giving instructions to Drifter on his earpiece.

    Jarhead: We an't lead them back to the American base and we can't lead them home! We're going to have to- SHIT!

    Panel 4: Shot of the two CZ mechas landing on the road in front of our heroes. There should be lots of rubble in the air to show the impact of the landing and the vehicles should be seen stopping abruptly in front of the CZ mechas

    SFX: KRA-KOOM!

    Page 18: 5 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of Drifter inside his vehicle. He is looking up at the CZ mechas and yelling.

    Drifter: They took out the road!

    Panel 2: Shot of Jarhead from inside his vehicle. He is looking towards Drifter as he barks commands.

    Jarhead: I sent out the automated distress call as soon as we came up on these things. We have to evade until help arrives!

    Panel 3: Shot of Drifter. He is still looking up at the CZ mecha and yelling.

    Drifter: **** that! These things can outrun us and they've already got reinforcements! We have to fight!

    Panel 4: Close-up of Drifter's hand hitting the mecha button on his panel.

    Drifter: Time to transform!

    Panel 5: Shot of the the vehicles in front of the CZ mecha. The mecha are poised for battle and Drifter's vehicle is coming apart, beginning the transformation sequence.

    SFX: WHRR! CLACK! WHRR! CLACK! CLACK!

    Jarhead: Drifter, don't!

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    PG 14: Splaxh with 4 insets

    Inset 1: 3/4 full body shot of one of the Zombas on her floating platform. She has her arm extended towards the right of the page and is yelling a command. Her dialogue will be uninteligible alien text.

    Inset 2: The two CZ mecha are running behind the vehicles, arms outstretched and closing fast.

    INset 3: Head shot of Drifter screaming into his ear piece.

    Drifter: They're closing in, Bro! We're not gonna be able to outrun 'em! We have to turn and fight!

    Inset 4: Head shot of Jarhead screaming into his ear piece.

    Jarhead: Bullshit! We're not getting ourselved killed just because you want to break in your new toy! Use evasive manuevers and engage with rear weaponry only!


    Page 15: 5 Panels

    Panel 1: Head shot of Drifter. Can be profile or 3/4 view.

    Drifter: Eat this you comiie sons of bitches!

    Panel 2: Close-up of Drifter's hand as he presses the rear missile launch button on his dashboard panel.

    SFX: Tek

    Panel 3: Close-up of two multiple rocket launchers on the sides of drifter's vehicle. They are firing a barrage of missiles.

    SFX: Choom! Choom! Choom!

    Panel 4: Shot of one of the CZ Mechas being hit by missiles. Arms and legs outstreched in mid-air, it's being knocked off its feet by the missiles.

    Panel 5: Side shot of Drifter inside the vehicle. He is looking back with a smiling scream as he celebrates.

    Drifter: It's down! It's down! Take that, you skull-faced bastard!

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Page 10: 5 panels

    Panel 1: Shot of Jarhead and Drifter's mecha from the shoulder up. They are also looking down at the Fatman.

    Jarhead: Drifter and I will also train at home.

    Panel 2: Same type of shot of Bruce's mecha.

    Bruce: I'll remain here. I don't really have an inconspicuous place in which to test this thing out.

    Panels 3-5: Same shot for each mecha respectively.

    Canuck: I'm training here.

    Noreseman: Here

    Techno Demon: I'm staying. I still have to scan this thing for any tech designs you may have stolen from me!


    Page 11: 2 Panels

    Panel 1: Shot of Jarhead and Drifter's vehicles as they head home. It is an old highway surrounded by wilderness.

    Caption: Later, as Jarhead and Drifter head home...

    Drifter: (from inside his car, in square balloon to show he is using the radio) I can't wait to see how fast this thing runs in mecha mode!

    Jarhead: (in same kind of balloon) I'm more interested in its weapons and defense capabilities.

    Drifter: A marine to the end; that's my brother!

    Panel 2: back shot of the vehicles rounding a bend. Beyond the horizon two CZ mechas can be seen.

    Jarhead: A careless speed freak, that's my- What the?!


    Page 12:Splash page of the vehicles screeching to a halt as the Commie Zombie mechas block the road. There should still be a vague background but mostly clouded by speed lines. The CZ mecha will have a small army of Commie Zombies at their feet and two Zombas will be foating on flying platforms between the mechas.

    SFX: (at the tires of Jarhead and Drifter's vehicles) SCRRREEE!!!


    Page 13: 5 panels.

    Panel 1: Profile shot of Jarhead's face from inside his vehicle.

    Jarhead: Time to put it in reverse, little brother!

    Panel 2: Same shot but this time it's Drifter's profile. He has a look of defiance on his face as he stares down the enemy.

    Drifter: No way! We just got these cool new mechas. We can teake 'em!

    Panel 3: Waist high front shot of Jarhead inside the vehicle. He is screaming into his ear piece.

    Jarhead: We can't take 'em with gear we don't know how to use! Like it or not we have to retreat! That's an order, soldier!

    Panel 4: Same shot as panel 3 but of Drifter inside his vehicle. He is looking down to the side, angry at having to retreat.

    Drifter: Damnit!

    Panel 5: Action shot of the cars reversing and screeching back to where they came from.

    SFX: (below each car as they reverse) SCREEE!!

    SFX: (below each car as they take off) VRRRMMM!!!

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    Page 8: 5 panels.

    Panel 1: Inside shot of Brokenhill's mecha. The steering wheel has split into two multi jointed lever with holes for each finger. This should be a worm's eye view from the ground of the cockpit so that we can see these details. His feet should be visible, on on the gas pedal. Brockenhill is visibly upset and screaming down at the Fatman.

    Brokenhill: Why didn't you tell us this was going to happen?! We haven't even learned how to drive these things!!!

    Panel 2: 3/4 view from the inside of Max's mecha. Max seems to be enjoying the ride as his mecha marches towards Brokenhill's.

    Max: It's easy, Dad! The gas pedal makes it go and the break pedal makes it stop. Just like in vehicle mode!

    Brokenhill: (from inside the mecha) What about turning, smart guy?!

    Panel 3: Max's mecha runs head on into Brokenhill's mecha.

    SFX: KLANG!

    Panel 4: Max's mecha sit's on the floor of the hangar, holding its head while Brokenhill's lays completely straight on the floor.

    Max: Sorry, Dad...

    Panel 5: Profile shot of Brokenhill facing straight up. He is screaming angrily.

    Brokenhill: FATMAAANN!!!


    Page 9: 4 panels

    Panel 1: Shot of the robots standing about. Max's mecha is still sitting on the ground and Brokenhill's still lays as it did when it fell. Brokenhill is crawling out of the cockpit on the mecha's chest. The Fatman stands in perspective in front of the scene so we will only see him from behind.

    Fatman: Sorry, BH. I didn't expect any of you to try to manuever them right away. We can begin your training here immediately. Each vehicle has been equipped with instructional holo-vids.

    Panel 2: shot of Brokenhill still only half way out of the cockpit. He is leaning his head on one hand.

    Brokenhill: Max and I will be taking ours home.

    Panel 3: Shot of mecha Max's face as it looks down at Brokenhill.

    Max: (in a square balloon to show he is heard through a speaker) Aaaw, Dad! I wanted to train here!

    Panel 4: Shot of Brokenhill looking up at Max and then down towards the floor.

    Brokenhill: You know we're both still needed at home! (In smaller font) Besides, something tells me I'm going to need your help understanding the controls.

    Leave a comment:


  • fatmancomics
    replied
    I've given up on trying to get volunteers for this. It's been four years. I just finished the script to prove to myself that I could do it and now that I have I want it to be read. Here's more:

    Page 4: 3 panels

    Panel 1: Haf page splash of nondescript hangar. The heroes' vehicles, modified with more weapons are parked in the center. The heroes are walking in behind the Fatman.

    Caption: One half mile below...

    Fatman: Gentlemen, your new weapons.

    Panel 2: Close-up of Drifter, he looks dissappointed.

    Drifter: The new weaponry is cool, Fatman but these look just like our old cars.

    Panel 3: Close-up of the Fatman, the same mischevious expression from panel 6 on the previous page on his face.

    Fatman: Get in.


    Page 5: 3 panels

    Panel 1: Same half page splash as the previous page only this time the heroes are stepping into their vehicles.

    Fatman: I figured you gentlemen would like a test drive.

    Canuck: There isn't enough room in here to drive these things around!

    Fatman: Ah, but there is enough room to walk them around.

    Panel 2: Shot of the Canuck in the driver seat from outside the car window.

    Canuck: Walk? What do you mean, walk?!

    Panel 3: Shot of the control panel inside one of the vehicles. There should be lots of buttons, lever and gauges next to the basic controls. In the center there should be the button the Fatman describes.

    Fatman: Gentlemen, among the new controls you'll find a red button with a human silhouette on it. Please press that button now.

    Page 6: Splash page. Birds eye shot of the vehicles as a transformation sequence occurs. The Fatman stands in the middle.

    SFX: (around each vehicle) WHRRR! CLACK! CHKK! WHRRR!


    Page 7: Splash page. Same bird's eye shot as before but this time the vehicles have transformed into giant robots, each unique in design, each with a robotic version of its pilot's face.

    Fatman: Hasbro, eat your heart out.
    Last edited by fatmancomics; 06-09-2015, 01:56 AM.

    Leave a comment:

Unconfigured Ad Widget

Collapse
Working...
X