Working Title: Fusion

[Shawn Richter]

[SAndrews]

i suggest inking it to see if your blacks are working... and you will learn a lot of valuable skills in composition, not to mention inking. I suggest using reference material when drawing things that you are new at, for example the muscles on panel 5.

[Shawn Richter]

[Tommy Allison]

Too much dead space between the characters. You should try a different viewing angle, or draw the characters bigger. Don't draw with the word balloons in mind. That might help you.

[TropicalPencil]

I have to disagree with the last comment. In my opinion it's better to draw with the word balloons in mind to make sure they don't cut off any important visuals. Not leaving enough space for word balloons is a common problem and it does put added effort to the letterer to find a way to fit them in and not detract from the art work.

Honestly, there is a lot of negative space but it won't matter for the most part once the word balloons go in. It's good practice to draw leaving enough space for the captions.

[BountyHunter]

Well, I think it looks great, Shawn.

[F!]

Too much dead space between the characters. You should try a different viewing angle, or draw the characters bigger. Don't draw with the word balloons in mind. That might help you.

That's the single worst piece of advice I've ever read on here. Always, ALWAYS account for lettering when drawing sequentials. Creating comics is about telling a story through the combination of pictures and words, not making something to hang on a wall.

The rule of thumb is to leave approximately a third of the panel ‘empty’, more if the script is particularly dense. I think if I got a page like this to letter, and found there was a ton of dialogue to place, I'd probably want to name my first kid after the artist.

[ScottEwen]

I agree. That is terrible advice. I usually letter my own pages anyway, but when I'm not the letterer on something, I always pencil in the words anyway, just to make sure there's enough room.

[F!]

I've always liked you, Scott Ewen.

[Shawn Richter]

Tommy - Well, it looks like you're entitled to your opinion. In this case, I think we'll have to agree to disagree.

Tropical Pencil, Finch, Scott Ewen - I've always heard the same thing. I generally try to leave a third of a panel, if not blank, at least unimportant. I cringe when I have to letter over the top of a characters head (obscuring the hair or whatnot).

Bounty - Thanks for the kind words.

Check out pages 2 and 3:
It's a double page spread.