The Secrets Out

**ZombieKilla** · 08-28-2006, 08:28 AM

I've posted sequentials for a 5 page script I wrote for writing contest #13 about a retiring super hero. I've posted the sequentials in the sequential forum titled 'The Secrets Out' PsychoFyre (a fellow Hellboarder from CBR forums) did a great job on the sequentials. Let us know what you think.

**ZombieKilla** · 08-28-2006, 08:43 AM

Here are the sequentials to a 5 page script that I wrote for writing contest #13 that was about a retiring super hero. PsychoFyre (a fellow Hellboarder from CBRs forum) did all of the sequentials for me. I think he did a great job. Let us know what you think.

**ZombieKilla** · 08-28-2006, 08:44 AM

here are the other two pages

**AlphaMale73** · 08-28-2006, 11:43 AM

dude don't kill him!

**ZombieKilla** · 08-28-2006, 12:15 PM

Originally Posted by AlphaMale73

dude don't kill him!

It's a sad day for Mr. Moral

He should've retired a long time ago... mwahahaha

unless you want to see more of him haha

**JimLeeforGod** · 08-28-2006, 11:37 PM

It needs to have some line wieght, which would really make the pictures pop out of the page more and show light source. Also all the faces are very flat so keep in mind the curves of the human body. Good work, keep it up.

**JimLeeforGod** · 08-28-2006, 11:41 PM

Whoops just read that you didnt do the pencils. Disregard the prior information unless you want to pass it on to your friend

If its a writing piece you might want to post it in the writing section, you might get a bigger response there

**JimLeeforGod** · 08-29-2006, 03:43 AM

heheh okay I see that you had already posted it here, my bad! Geez did I just say my bad, crap did I just say Geez! UGGGHHHHHHH!

**ZombieKilla** · 08-29-2006, 07:31 AM

Originally Posted by JimLeeforGod

It needs to have some line wieght, which would really make the pictures pop out of the page more and show light source. Also all the faces are very flat so keep in mind the curves of the human body. Good work, keep it up.

Thanks for the critique I will pass it on to the artist.