One page writing challenge - Dinner Party

[My name is Tommy]

Full disclosure: I kind of took this idea from a Digital Webbing poster. But, I registered for that site over a year ago and still haven't been accepted(I wrote my 1-pager thinking I'd be able to post it by the next day) so, I decided to try it here.

I know for me personally, all of my strengths lie within the long haul of a story and character building, so this should help those with similar issues get to the point.

So, basically, the idea here isn't to challenge each other, but ourselves. It's not so much about "winning" something, but just building and hearing critiques/praises from fellow writers. Also, specify in the beginning of the post if you're okay with an artist drawing the page for their/your portfolio. :]



The theme for this one is: "Dinner Party". Outside of that, have at it.

Since there will be no winners/losers, there will be no deadline(the more posts the better!). Also, I'm fine with anyone else issuing 1-page challenges. If you do though, contact me so I can participate. I'll post mine soon, have to do some work on another project right now though.


Aaaaaaaaand GO!

[WildAces]

What's wrong with the two separate five-page challenges we have been doing?

[My name is Tommy]

Not a thing. I plan on partaking. I just think it's tougher to tell a whole story or grab someones attention in one page than in five and worth giving a shot. Just figured some folks may have fun with this.

[Shaun]

Thought of this idea myself a while back but never got around to doing it. So kudos for that. But 1 page seems overly limiting. Might give it a shot if you do one in the future that is a 3 pager.

[My name is Tommy]

Yeah, the fun to me is in the limitation. The downside though is that it almost has to be a super dense, panel heavy page. I'm having trouble with it myself but will try to have a page up by the end of the day.

Tell you what though Shaun, you do a 1-pager here, and I promise a 3-pager in the very near future.

[My name is Tommy]

Since I started the thread, I'll post what I wrote for DW but never got to post there. I haven't touched it since the day I wrote it, so it probably isn't very good haha. Also, it's 2 years old and from when I was still learning how to write comic scripts and is meant to be kind of cheesy. So it's probably embarrassing haha.

The theme was: "My new toy".

Everything after this is copy pasted. here goes.

Bashley-Platinum blond hair, pigtails. attire = school girl meets
super villain(dark!). she wears a black, robin-like mask.

Jonny - semilong black hair. faded black shirt and dark blue sweat
pants. scruff on his face just growing in. looks like he hasnt
showered in about a week.

(forgive the campiness, twas intentional)

Captain Punch Vs. Bashley Collins, Issue 2
My New Toy

PAGE 22 (8 panels)

PANEL 1. We are in a small apartment. An old television sits on top
of a coffee table tuned to a fuzzy channel 6 news. We can faintly see
an anchor at the news desk. Jonny is sitting on the couch in front of
the TV. All we see of Jonny is his right hand holding a half eaten
donut dangling from the arm of the couch dircectly in front of the
"camera".


ANCHOR: ... Bashley Collins managed to escape while Captain Punch was
supporting the collapsing bridge on his back--

BASHLEY (OP): Turn that crap off, would you?


PANEL 2. Bashley is entering the apartment. She has an "it's been a long
day" expression on her face. She is wearing her mask. The camera is at
an angle to where we can still see Jonny(preferably near the bottom of
the panel).

JONNY: But this is my favorite part!

You know, after so many times I would think he'd run
out of new ways to stop you.


BASHLEY: Well maybe if I didn't have a deadbeat roommate I could take
a day off to come up with a less obvious scheme.


PANEL 3. Small panel. Close up of Bashley's mask. She has taken it off
and is placing it on the coffee table the TV is on.


BASHLEY: At least you got up long enough to get donuts today.


PANEL 4. Shot from Jonny's right side. He is still sitting on the
couch with his donut. Bashley is about to sit down at the other end of
the couch.


JONNY: One, villainy isn't a job, it's a step above being a photographer.

JONNY: And two, if I were stuck working somewhere, who would have
signed for your package while you were out?


PANEL 5. Close up of Bashely,Who now has an extremely happy, somewhat
surprised expession on her face.

BASHLEY: It came?!

JONNY(OP): It's in there on your bed. Got here twenty minutes ago.

BASHLEY: Why didn't you say so?!



PANEL 6. Bashley's bed is right next to her bedroom door. Bashley has
just entered her room. We see a big wooden crate sitting on her bed.
A crowbar is sitting on top of the crate. (note* Jonny;s dialogue are
coming from Bashley's doorwar.)


JONNY(OP): Moodswing much? What's in that big ass crate anyway?

BASHLEY: My new toy!! Come on, I'll show you!


PANEL 7. Extreme close up. Bashley has both hands on the crowbar. She
has it in the crate and has just pried it open.


SFX: CRACK!

BASHLEY: This, Jonny, is how I'm finally going to beat Captain Punch!


PANEL 8. Shot from the other side of the bed at a slightly upward
angle. It's vital that we can't see into the crate. Jonny is
completely awestruck. Bashley is grinning. She looks smug, she thinks
what's in this crate is her claim to fame.


JONNY: Oh. My. God! This is...

This is amazing!

BASHLEY: Don't wait up for me, Jonny boy.

BASHLEY: Mama's gonna be out late tonight.

[My name is Tommy]

Accidentally posted twice and won't let me remove it, so instead I'm turning it into an apology as to why I posted so quickly after for no good reason. CHEERS!(Great show. Also Coach. I like Coach)

[cresc]

Been meaning to write this down for years.

The Innocent

PAGE 1 (6 panels)

Panel 1

Close up of an alarm clock that is shaking in the air as it rings loudly.

Panel 2

Medium. We are behind Little Todd. He stands in front of his window stretching. His whole body should be in panel as he watches the beautiful sunrise outside the window.

Panel 3
Same angle. Little Todd is now midstride and closer to the camera. He should look happy and ready to take on the world.

Panel 4

Medium low. Little Todd is walking down the stairs on the left side, one hand on the railing. On the right side, in the distance we can see into the kitchen where 2 adults are sitting.

Panel 5

Over the shoulder of Little Todd. His Dad is standing behind the table getting coffee. His Mom is seated at the table she has her head in her hands and looks very sad.

Little Todd

Oh I forgot...

Panel 6

Close up of Little Todd now looking very sad and near tears.

Little Todd

… Grandpa died yesterday.

[cresc]

(((2x post)))

[My name is Tommy]

@Cresc: I really enjoy this for some reason. First off, it's only 6 pages, kudos and a half for that. Also I'm intrigued as to what happened and what will happen after.