The Dreamer
04-17-2004, 09:51 PM
Ok, lets get one thing straight.
I am not a comedy writer, nor do I claim to be. I am not even a big fan of the Tick. I never even watched one episode before I wrote this script which was around a year ago. My friend, Dash, had this stashed on his pc and I was like WOW!
Anyways, here is a little sample I did for a friend and I am curious to what you guys think.
C&C always welcome, but keep in mind my limited knowledge on the Tick.
Thanks guys,
The Tick Sample Script
C.D. White
Establishing Scene.
Tick and Arthur stand on a roof somewhere in The City.
Tick is looking off into the distance with a somewhat “noble” look of determination. Arthur looks discretely uncomfortable.
Tick: Arthur…do you smell that?
Arthur: What?
Tick: *whiffing* the air in front of Arthur’s nose. Smell the air around you, Arthur.
Arthur: *sniff* Yeah, isn’t that Popeye’s chicken?
Tick: No my winged companion of justice, smell……. deeper.
Arthur: Uh…ok…*inhale*…*cough* I got it! Pollution and car exhaust.
Tick: Ha! Really? You can smell that? You have more powers then you let on brave Arthur….no..no..that is the smell of DESTINY..of Adventure. Can you not smell the alluring aroma of a night filled with thwarting evil villains, saving damsels in distress, purveying true justice throughout our fair city???!!!
Arthur: Umm…I just smell chicken.
Female Voice: HELP!! Will some ambiguous superhero in blue tights and antennas come save me?!?!
Tick: You see ARTHUR!! Destiny calls!!
Let us go!!
Tick leaps from roof top to roof top following the screaming female voice Arthur is flying nearby.
Female Voice: OOOHH!! HELP!! HELP!! Will no one save me?!!
Tick: Come Arthur!! We can save the day before the last episode of American Idol!!
Abandoned Warehouse Scene.
The Tick and Arthur arrive at the Warehouse and see a strange man dressed in a black trench coat and top hat. He looks like a typical geek. Huge nose, bottle cap glasses, bloodshot eyes as if he hasn’t slept in a week. He is the Mad Conspiricist. He believes in that theory from the Matrix. You know, how the real Earth is ruled by robots and everything we experience is merely images and feelings that stimulate our brains…blah blah. Next to a large laser beam is an old scrawny man. This is Old Geezer, super villain of….Oldness. On the other side of the laser closer to the Mad C., is Voice Mimicker, he has the incredible power to….yes that’s right, MIMICK Voices. Have him in a cape and tights with a robotic neck with switches and lights on it.
Tick: Stop right there…..um what villain are you?…Are new in town? You know him Arthur?
Arthur: Can’t say that I do, Tick.
MC:*laughing manically* HAHAHAH!! Fools!!! You have fallen right into my trap!!! Old Geezer!! Push the BUTTON!!!!
Old Geezer: Don’t raise your voice at me young man!! Why in my day I’d put you over my knee faster then you can Howdy Doody!!
Tick and Arthur look at each other in confusion.
Tick: *With his fists raised* Ask him nicely…or else.
MC: *sighs* Will you PLEASE push the button that will capture the Tick and his bunny rabbit sidekick in the tractor beam??
Arthur: I am a MOTH!
Old Geezer: That’s more like it….*mumbles under his breath* Gosh darn whippersnappers….
Take a couple panels to show Old Geezer SLLLLOOOOWWLYY reaching to push the button.
All of a sudden that laser cannon blasts a purple beam that captures Tick and Arthur in suspended animation. But they can still talk!
Tick: What villainy is this!! Speak swiftly evil doer!! My patience is thinning!!!
MC: Fools oh how they have clouded your mind. Feeding your trickeries and false sensations!! If only you knew!!! But I know…yes I know the Truth!! I am free! And soon, I shall free the entire world!!!!
Arthur: Um…uh..ok…
Tick: Get real!! You crazy..wacky villian you!!
MC: HAHAH!!! Get real?? GET REAL??? How ironic.. You see..this WORLD isn’t real. The air. The sky. Popeye’s chicken!!!!! None of it is real!!! It all in our minds!! The alien robots…they did it!!!
MC begins to foam at the mouth….
Old Geezer: Jumpin Johosephat!! There he goes again!!
MC: They created a…Holographic world full of images and….STUFF that isn’t real. Its just….PROJECTED into our cranial nerves and we think we are living but we are really SLAVES!! That right slaves…human BATTERIES!!
Arthur: Hmmm, where have a I heard that before.
Tick: That does sound rather…..familiar.
Arthur: That’s from the Mat-
MC: *interrupting* NO! NO!! They stole that idea from me!! That movie!! I thought of it first!! I was the one- ARGH!!
MC goes into a convulsion and passes out with his nose running and his mouth foaming.
Tick: Well, that takes care of that one. Yet, there is still a piece missing from this puzzle. Where is that damsel in distress?
From out of nowhere out pops out..Voice Mimicker!!
VM: You mean me?!?! HELP HELP ! HEHEEHEH!! Sound familiar??? I am the Voice Mimicker…I have a secret device that allows me to….that’s right…Mimic any voice I hear…BWAAHAHAH!
Tick: Oh oh oh!! Can you do Brando?!?!
Arthur: Shouldn't we try and stop them...
Tick: Shhh! I wanna hear this!
All of a sudden from atop a nearby building we see Die Fledermaus standing there ominously. Batman-style. The all lookup to see him as he speaks in his monotone, calm voice.
Tick: Die Fledermaus!! He can do Brando!!
DF: I am the fire that burns your toast. I am IRS agent that knocks on your door at 4oclock in the morning as soon as your paranoia dies down and you finally get to sleep!! I am-
All of a sudden….yes all of a sudden..AGAIN, we see American Maid bursting into the scene in all of her patriotic glory!
A M : *interrupting* Three months late for your child support check!
DF: American Maid?!?! Nuh uh..I paid that!
AM: Then where is the money!?
DA: What?!! You probably spent it all on...on BOOZE!!
AM: What did you say?? Why I oughtta...
DA: Come on! You look like a man..lets see if you can take a hit like one!
DF and AM start wrestling with one another rolling around on the roof throughout the backgrounds of the following panels.
Old Geezer: *sighs* Young people…I swear this next generation is going to destroy the world!
VM: Now I have you!! I have captured the elusive Tick! ME ME ME ME!!!
Just then the wrestling DF and AM hit the Laser Cannon and shuts of the tractor beam!
Tick: Great work my super comrades! Now justice can be served fast like….fast food!!
Tick leaps into the air toward Voice Mimicker!
VM: MOMMY!!
Tick: Arthur quick, subdue the elderly man before he gets away!!
Arthur looks at Old Geezer and he makes his agonizingly slow attempt at getting away.
Old Geezer: Hehehe hohoho! You’ll never catch me youngin’
We see him move in almost slow motion inches at time trying to get away.
Old Geezer: *huff huff*
Arthur: Umm..ok Tick.
The Tick now has Voice Mimicker in a choke hold giving him a noogie and we can see DF and AM still wrestling in the background.
Tick: Gentle with him now. We must remember to respect the elderly, even if they are a disciple of darkness!!
VM: You’ll never take me alive!
Just then he reaches a hand a flips a switch on his neck.
VM: This is the President speaking. Unhand the Voice Mimicker this instant!!
Tick: The President??! Oh my what have I done?!? Please forgive me your, Highness!
Arthur: No Tick! That’s just the Voice Mimicker trying to trick you!
VM: Darn you bunny rabbit sidekick!! Thwarted again!!!
Tick: That’s right evil doers!! Once again justice is served. Just like a piping hot plate of justice pie. You will have to get up pretty darn early in morning to pull a fast one on….
THE TICK!!
Next scene is back in the apartment where Tick and Arthur sit on the coach watching the TV. Tick is in his robe and Arthur has a huge bowl of popcorn in his lap that both are eating out off.
TV Caption ( American Idol): I havent heard something sound that bad since I ran over my cat with the lawn mower!
Tick: Ahh..after an evening of surving The City and thrashing bad people, this is oh so well deserved.
Arthur: You said it, Tick. You said it.
The END.
I am not a comedy writer, nor do I claim to be. I am not even a big fan of the Tick. I never even watched one episode before I wrote this script which was around a year ago. My friend, Dash, had this stashed on his pc and I was like WOW!
Anyways, here is a little sample I did for a friend and I am curious to what you guys think.
C&C always welcome, but keep in mind my limited knowledge on the Tick.
Thanks guys,
The Tick Sample Script
C.D. White
Establishing Scene.
Tick and Arthur stand on a roof somewhere in The City.
Tick is looking off into the distance with a somewhat “noble” look of determination. Arthur looks discretely uncomfortable.
Tick: Arthur…do you smell that?
Arthur: What?
Tick: *whiffing* the air in front of Arthur’s nose. Smell the air around you, Arthur.
Arthur: *sniff* Yeah, isn’t that Popeye’s chicken?
Tick: No my winged companion of justice, smell……. deeper.
Arthur: Uh…ok…*inhale*…*cough* I got it! Pollution and car exhaust.
Tick: Ha! Really? You can smell that? You have more powers then you let on brave Arthur….no..no..that is the smell of DESTINY..of Adventure. Can you not smell the alluring aroma of a night filled with thwarting evil villains, saving damsels in distress, purveying true justice throughout our fair city???!!!
Arthur: Umm…I just smell chicken.
Female Voice: HELP!! Will some ambiguous superhero in blue tights and antennas come save me?!?!
Tick: You see ARTHUR!! Destiny calls!!
Let us go!!
Tick leaps from roof top to roof top following the screaming female voice Arthur is flying nearby.
Female Voice: OOOHH!! HELP!! HELP!! Will no one save me?!!
Tick: Come Arthur!! We can save the day before the last episode of American Idol!!
Abandoned Warehouse Scene.
The Tick and Arthur arrive at the Warehouse and see a strange man dressed in a black trench coat and top hat. He looks like a typical geek. Huge nose, bottle cap glasses, bloodshot eyes as if he hasn’t slept in a week. He is the Mad Conspiricist. He believes in that theory from the Matrix. You know, how the real Earth is ruled by robots and everything we experience is merely images and feelings that stimulate our brains…blah blah. Next to a large laser beam is an old scrawny man. This is Old Geezer, super villain of….Oldness. On the other side of the laser closer to the Mad C., is Voice Mimicker, he has the incredible power to….yes that’s right, MIMICK Voices. Have him in a cape and tights with a robotic neck with switches and lights on it.
Tick: Stop right there…..um what villain are you?…Are new in town? You know him Arthur?
Arthur: Can’t say that I do, Tick.
MC:*laughing manically* HAHAHAH!! Fools!!! You have fallen right into my trap!!! Old Geezer!! Push the BUTTON!!!!
Old Geezer: Don’t raise your voice at me young man!! Why in my day I’d put you over my knee faster then you can Howdy Doody!!
Tick and Arthur look at each other in confusion.
Tick: *With his fists raised* Ask him nicely…or else.
MC: *sighs* Will you PLEASE push the button that will capture the Tick and his bunny rabbit sidekick in the tractor beam??
Arthur: I am a MOTH!
Old Geezer: That’s more like it….*mumbles under his breath* Gosh darn whippersnappers….
Take a couple panels to show Old Geezer SLLLLOOOOWWLYY reaching to push the button.
All of a sudden that laser cannon blasts a purple beam that captures Tick and Arthur in suspended animation. But they can still talk!
Tick: What villainy is this!! Speak swiftly evil doer!! My patience is thinning!!!
MC: Fools oh how they have clouded your mind. Feeding your trickeries and false sensations!! If only you knew!!! But I know…yes I know the Truth!! I am free! And soon, I shall free the entire world!!!!
Arthur: Um…uh..ok…
Tick: Get real!! You crazy..wacky villian you!!
MC: HAHAH!!! Get real?? GET REAL??? How ironic.. You see..this WORLD isn’t real. The air. The sky. Popeye’s chicken!!!!! None of it is real!!! It all in our minds!! The alien robots…they did it!!!
MC begins to foam at the mouth….
Old Geezer: Jumpin Johosephat!! There he goes again!!
MC: They created a…Holographic world full of images and….STUFF that isn’t real. Its just….PROJECTED into our cranial nerves and we think we are living but we are really SLAVES!! That right slaves…human BATTERIES!!
Arthur: Hmmm, where have a I heard that before.
Tick: That does sound rather…..familiar.
Arthur: That’s from the Mat-
MC: *interrupting* NO! NO!! They stole that idea from me!! That movie!! I thought of it first!! I was the one- ARGH!!
MC goes into a convulsion and passes out with his nose running and his mouth foaming.
Tick: Well, that takes care of that one. Yet, there is still a piece missing from this puzzle. Where is that damsel in distress?
From out of nowhere out pops out..Voice Mimicker!!
VM: You mean me?!?! HELP HELP ! HEHEEHEH!! Sound familiar??? I am the Voice Mimicker…I have a secret device that allows me to….that’s right…Mimic any voice I hear…BWAAHAHAH!
Tick: Oh oh oh!! Can you do Brando?!?!
Arthur: Shouldn't we try and stop them...
Tick: Shhh! I wanna hear this!
All of a sudden from atop a nearby building we see Die Fledermaus standing there ominously. Batman-style. The all lookup to see him as he speaks in his monotone, calm voice.
Tick: Die Fledermaus!! He can do Brando!!
DF: I am the fire that burns your toast. I am IRS agent that knocks on your door at 4oclock in the morning as soon as your paranoia dies down and you finally get to sleep!! I am-
All of a sudden….yes all of a sudden..AGAIN, we see American Maid bursting into the scene in all of her patriotic glory!
A M : *interrupting* Three months late for your child support check!
DF: American Maid?!?! Nuh uh..I paid that!
AM: Then where is the money!?
DA: What?!! You probably spent it all on...on BOOZE!!
AM: What did you say?? Why I oughtta...
DA: Come on! You look like a man..lets see if you can take a hit like one!
DF and AM start wrestling with one another rolling around on the roof throughout the backgrounds of the following panels.
Old Geezer: *sighs* Young people…I swear this next generation is going to destroy the world!
VM: Now I have you!! I have captured the elusive Tick! ME ME ME ME!!!
Just then the wrestling DF and AM hit the Laser Cannon and shuts of the tractor beam!
Tick: Great work my super comrades! Now justice can be served fast like….fast food!!
Tick leaps into the air toward Voice Mimicker!
VM: MOMMY!!
Tick: Arthur quick, subdue the elderly man before he gets away!!
Arthur looks at Old Geezer and he makes his agonizingly slow attempt at getting away.
Old Geezer: Hehehe hohoho! You’ll never catch me youngin’
We see him move in almost slow motion inches at time trying to get away.
Old Geezer: *huff huff*
Arthur: Umm..ok Tick.
The Tick now has Voice Mimicker in a choke hold giving him a noogie and we can see DF and AM still wrestling in the background.
Tick: Gentle with him now. We must remember to respect the elderly, even if they are a disciple of darkness!!
VM: You’ll never take me alive!
Just then he reaches a hand a flips a switch on his neck.
VM: This is the President speaking. Unhand the Voice Mimicker this instant!!
Tick: The President??! Oh my what have I done?!? Please forgive me your, Highness!
Arthur: No Tick! That’s just the Voice Mimicker trying to trick you!
VM: Darn you bunny rabbit sidekick!! Thwarted again!!!
Tick: That’s right evil doers!! Once again justice is served. Just like a piping hot plate of justice pie. You will have to get up pretty darn early in morning to pull a fast one on….
THE TICK!!
Next scene is back in the apartment where Tick and Arthur sit on the coach watching the TV. Tick is in his robe and Arthur has a huge bowl of popcorn in his lap that both are eating out off.
TV Caption ( American Idol): I havent heard something sound that bad since I ran over my cat with the lawn mower!
Tick: Ahh..after an evening of surving The City and thrashing bad people, this is oh so well deserved.
Arthur: You said it, Tick. You said it.
The END.