Some new pages

[Caimano]

It's a lot of time I don't post my work here...it's because I don't visit the forum with regularity (my fault)

These are some new pages from the military project book I'm working on...I work really hard to meet the deadline: I have to draw 26 pages by the mid of August.

However hope you like:
http://www.guglie.it/images/Tav8.jpg

http://www.guglie.it/images/Tav9.jpg

http://www.guglie.it/images/Tav10.jpg

[Ra Havok]

If I saw this on a shelf in my comic book store, and if the story is ok, I would buy this in a heartbeat. Very impressive, Simone!

I said it before, but I'll say it again: this is of pro-quality.

[saTHOMASo]

wow ... finally some new pages from you :)



those pages rock!



what i think is very very cool is the panel-shot from underneath the jeep!





keep us informed with your new stuff! ;onei;

[Cuddly]

Simone, this is some really fantastic work!! Always a pleasure seeing your work. That jeep is absolutely awesome.

Are you going to ink and letter these yourself or will that be handled by different people?

[Sinx]

Awesome stuff (as usual ;)) Your so good at drawing hardware. OK, so what page are you up to now?(I don't mind if you'd rather not say! )

[cheeks-74]

man, I love your storytelling. you're handle on different angles and composition is tiop notch. great job!

[Popninja]

Your pages are a shining example of excellent storytelling. When I see your work, however, I feel like such a slacker.

Love the shot from under the jeep.

[Caimano]

Thanks guys, I'm going to post some new pages very soon... hope to finish it in order to sleep a bit more than now.

Ra: Thanks my friend, at the beginning the publisher told us about the possibility to be published in France, Belgium etc... I didn't heard any news about it tho.

saThomaso: Glad you like them...my intention is post with a sort of regularity...let'see

Cuddly: the pages will be inked by a friend of mine and the publisher is going to letter them...I'd like to ink them but at these days (work, wife, baby etc..) I can just pencil some pages and that's all

Sinclair: I'm drawing page 20 and 21... very big surprise stay tuned pal

Cheeks: Thanks

Popninja: Thanks, storytelling is my main goal when I start to draw a board, I hope always every page is really easy to read, but not always I'm able to do it as I'd like. However I always try to do my best.

[Spidey]

Originally posted by Ra Havok
If I saw this on a shelf in my comic book store, and if the story is ok, I would buy this in a heartbeat.
Agreed! I never seen your work before, this stuff is excellent.
I love the way you draw the rifles and jeeps. This is great stuff.

[Klatuu]

Okay, I'm going to give you the exact same crit that Brian Steelfreeze gave me at Heroes Con a while back and what totally changed the way I tell stories. First off its obvious you can draw. No one here can doubt that. You're alot more reaslitic than I am. I draw more graphically but wow. Great work. I can really believe alot of the stuff in your pages.

Okay. The bad part. Well it's not bad really. You can tell a story. No doubt. But if you want to take your storytelling to the next level, which of course is what it's all about... you need to learn visual clues.

Anyway look at your pages. The one thing I notice panel to panel is there aren't many visual clues. Lets take the first two panels for instance. Yeah I know it's the same guy in both panels but you could reinforce that by showing the tip of his gun in the first panel. The gun would be a visual clue that reinforces the next panel. And the third panel. All we see is feet. And the guy with the gun in that panel we could easily confuse with the guy in the second panel because he has a gun. Plus where did the bodies come from all of a sudden. What I would have done in the second panel is pulled back a little and shown some of the bodies as a visual clue so that in the third panel we get a feel of who is standing where.

Make sense?

Basically Visual clues are something that happen in each panel that should be present in the following panel..(or when you get really good at it.. also several panels or pages later).

For instance here is a sample story.

Opening shot is a kitchen. We see in the foreground a butcher knife in a knife holder thing. And other kitchen accessories. A refrigerator is in the middleground. In the background is a door.

We see a woman come in obvoiusly furious. She leans against the door of a refrigerator which is in the middle ground and starts to cry.

A guy enters and we obviously see he's a slob.. drunkard. He comes in and starts yelling. The woman turns and screams back at him, still crying. He slaps her. She falls against the counter and sees the butcher knife. She grabs it and stabs the guy.


Anyway I could go on with this idea but the poing is using the visual clue of the knife. We establish it as a visual clue. A prop. And three or four pages later we can use it. Or we can use it panel to panel.

Anyway that's my crit. Keep it up yo. Wicked art.

Klatuu.

[Caimano]

Spidey: I'm happy you like them. Thanks a lot for your words


Originally posted by Klatuu

Lets take the first two panels for instance. Yeah I know it's the same guy in both panels but you could reinforce that by showing the tip of his gun in the first panel. The gun would be a visual clue that reinforces the next panel. And the third panel. All we see is feet. And the guy with the gun in that panel we could easily confuse with the guy in the second panel because he has a gun. Plus where did the bodies come from all of a sudden. What I would have done in the second panel is pulled back a little and shown some of the bodies as a visual clue so that in the third panel we get a feel of who is standing where.



Klatuu, I got your point there and I agree with you about the first 3 panels...I think the second board works better because for example the young guy hair sash and other things work as visual clues.

Thanks a lot for ponting it out tho:)