View Full Version : Overcaffeinated Webcomic critique
04-05-2003, 11:01 AM
Hi. I just discovered this forum and I have to say I'm quite intimidated. Everyone here seems to be a professional and quite good. Anyway, I'm always trying to improve, so if you want to take a look at the following and tell me what you think, it would mean a lot to me.
I don't know how well the effect on the first two frames (the sharing of the background between them) worked out and I'm looking for honest critique. Please point out any stuff I can improve at. Word balloon placement, dialog, art, background. Anything.
This is the strip from two weeks ago of my webcomic. Thanks for your time.
04-05-2003, 11:07 AM
You have a new fan, this strip is sick. CTRL+D and waiting for updates.
Welcome to Penciljack!!!
04-05-2003, 11:35 AM
Thanks a lot man! that gives me a fuzzy feeling :)
04-05-2003, 12:05 PM
Amazing stuff u can also add me to your list of fans :D
04-06-2003, 11:52 PM
Thanks guys! Any comments on style/layout/storytelling? on this or other strips?
04-07-2003, 12:27 PM
04-08-2003, 12:13 PM
i like it ... the only thing that bothers me is the panel break in the first 2 panels ... it seems almost distracting , cause you gave no indication that they were all in the same room from the beginning ... other than that i like , keep posting .:p ;pencil;
04-09-2003, 11:08 PM
Thanks a lot for your comments guys :p
I have something a little different now. This is last week's comic. It is more of a "comic book format" strip. I decided to go for a different, more realistic look when my characters are playing. This is the first one where that happens. I'd like to know what you think. Is the flow easily followed? Art? Lettering? I know that I broke the panel structure. Could you tell me if I made a no-no with this one? It lacks in backgrounds, but as it happens, this one I had to "release" before I was happy with it, due to time constraints (the comic is a weekly). Any critics and suggestions will be highly appreciated.
04-13-2003, 11:19 AM
...looks a bit too much like penny arcade style stuff. i don't know if that was your intention, but it looks like you pull a lot from that strip, and i'm not sure tahts a good thing. the dude in the mac shirt tipped me off, because there used to be a guy in the PA strips (i think his name was charles) and he was obsessed with macs and often wore a shirt like the one the dude in your comic is wearing. second, your second strip looks a little like 'over easy,' a comic based on gabe and tycho, made by PA.
but those are just my observations. maybe i'm the one thats obsessed.
04-13-2003, 11:56 AM
Well, I think my first few comics borrowed more from penny arcade. I've slowly been getting more comfortable with the style, but I hope it doesn't look like penny arcade. Did you mean the art style or the general feel of the comic?
As for the machead: Well, I wanted a mac fanatic and definitely had to put a mac symbol on his shirt... He doesn't actually look like the guy from Penny Arcade (he looks like a friend of mine, who is quite a fanatic).
I haven't read Over Easy, just seen the teaser shots Gabe puts up from time to time on his rant. I didn't think it looked like this. Does it? which are the similarities? This is actually how it will look when they're playing games. Any game, so from time to time it will feature spaceships, giant Mechs or whatnot. Just that right now they're playing Counter Strike.
The Penny Arcade look alike thing has bothered me a bit for a while now. If you find strong similarities in the art style could you point them out please? I'd like to get into my own style and not "borrow" too much from my influences.
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