Fusion Jam - an original origin story

[Ugga Bugga]

This is a Fusion Jam, where a script is developed page by page to completion with pencils, inks, colors and letters.

This first post is our Status post, which will be updated regularly.


______________________________________________

Status

1. In Progress Creating Hero - brainstorm flaws for the hero to overcome
2. Next step, waiting for previous step to be completed. Creating Nemises - Develop a villain or nemises that is really well suited to attack the particular flaw of the hero.
3. Creating Hero - figuring out powers that will allow Hero to defeat nemises once he overcomes the obstacle of his flaw.
4. Creating allies who will guide the hero through his flaw minefield.
5. Design the hero
6. Design the villain
7. Design the allies
8. Create 10 Page Script
9. Design new characters from script
10. Design locations from script
11. Assign Pages.

[Ugga Bugga]

Hi everyone. Time for another Fusion Jam. For those who do not know, a Fusion Jam is a project where a script is developed, and single page assignments are given to people on a time limited basis.

This time, i thought it would be useful to develop some original characters from scratch. To keep things simple, we will stick to the superhero genre. I realize that there are a million ways to do this, but I thought we would use an approach that I find very useful. Flaw based character development.

When someone is developing a superhero many people think, what are the powers. However to me, the powers are much less important than the flaws. In order to succeed our hero will need to overcome some deep seeded flaws.

These flaws come from psychological weakness in the character, and are both hurting his life, and the life of people around him. He is heroic, but cannot be the full hero until he overcomes this. (Our hero can be female, I am just using male for ease of reference)

I thought first, we can brainstorm some character flaws, that might be interesting to develop stories around.

I would ask that people just throw out some ideas. If we get stuck, and even if we don't get stuck, I will let you know some techniques I use to develop character flaw ideas.

[The P.R. Man]

our hero is a workaholic in regards to his superheroics, letting his job and marriage suffer as a result. now his superhero career is failing becouse he's in the middle of a nasty divorce, and has lost his job.

[Ugga Bugga]

workaholicism (is that a word), is an excellent work with. i would argue however that workaholism is a symptom of deeper flaws, and not necessarily a flaw himself. A set of flaws, and psychological needs leads him to bury himself in work, and neglect his family.

What is the deep rooted psychological flaw that is leading him to be a workaholic?

Let's answer the question, what is it that would drive someone to workaholism.


The result of the flaw is that he buries himself in work.

[sirandal]

Typical for that is failure to receive parental approval (never good enough-ism).

[Ugga Bugga]

okay, good.


I'm just going to riff here, feel free to join in.

-need to prove oneself - why?
-didn't get approval from parents. - so what?
-parents didn't provide approval, so child does not feel validated....... So what?
-never felt useful, or good enough ........so what
-it is extremely frustrating to never feel good enough, and always trying to prove oneself to someone that will never give approval -

What is the consequence of someone never getting approval from a parent
-no matter how hard they try, they feel they are a failure? - so what?
-you can never be successful if you define success as getting validation from someone who will never grant it, no matter how well you do. What does that mean?
-If you hold yourself to a standard of someone else, you are doomed to fail.


By asking questions so what and what does that mean, we can flesh out the real issues that the story will address.

[Ugga Bugga]

Okay, so next, using this weakness. Let's figure out need. Ask yourself this question.

In order to live a better, and more psychologically healthy life, our hero needs to _____________________________________.

[blamito]

Maybe the hero's father/mother was "the world's greatest hero". Who died saving the world or something. The hero never got the attention thay desired from their parent, and is always trying to live up to that standard. Hence the workaholism. And the divorce that was mentiond happens because the hero is never home and is always going off to fight crime and risk his life despite having a family at home. The hero going off to fight crime and leaving someone at home to worry about them has been done, but rearly is there consequences.

[Ugga Bugga]

Okay, this is good. There is tons of stuff embedded in those comments, so let's break it down.

Our hero is a workaholic perfectionist. Why?
Because he is trying to live up to the standard of his father (or mother), who was the perfect superhero. Why?
Because his perfect parent, never acknowleged our hero's worth, and he has spent his entire life trying to live up to that standard,,,,,, What are the consequences of that?

He neglects his family, trying to save the world. His family suffers. He suffers............


Now....... In order for our hero to lead a happy life he needs to __________________________________________.

some ideas- be his own man, getting out of the shadow
-stop worrying about living up to a standard, but understand that all he can do is his best. Even his perfect parent wasn't so perfect, just a martyr.

Any other ideas?

[blamito]

It's probably not really plausable, but maybe a crisis occurs, and somehow the hero's family is involved. Maybe they don't necessarily "save the day" but saves their family. In the process realizing they shouldn't repeat the sins of the parent and the value of family in the process.

That's a little disney though.

So, there could be a crisis, the hero's family dies as a result if their incompetence, and the hero becomes a villan.

[Guru_George]

Great idea Ugga Bugga. I'm thinking of joining, just for the creative designing reason's.

[Ugga Bugga]

It's probably not really plausable, but maybe a crisis occurs, and somehow the hero's family is involved. Maybe they don't necessarily "save the day" but saves their family. In the process realizing they shouldn't repeat the sins of the parent and the value of family in the process.

That's a little disney though.

So, there could be a crisis, the hero's family dies as a result if their incompetence, and the hero becomes a villan.


I realize that what you work from a flaw, ideas for story come flowing, but I don't want to jump ahead in the process to quickly. I am really concerned here with developing theme. Developing the true essense of what the hero's story is about. I find it easier to write a story, if you know how the hero needs to change to solve his problems, before you figure out what the problems are, because then you can really craft the problems to directly attack this weakness, and make a stronger story.


At this stage, I want to figure out need. what does the hero need in order to live a better and more fulfilling life.

Here are some ideas.

-He needs to stop trying to impress those who do not matter
-He needs to stop judging himself by impossible standards
-Perhaps he needs to stop avoiding homelife by drowning himself in work.

There are countless ideas. I'd love to hear other ideas, on what the hero ultimately needs to do, in order to live a better, happier, and more successful life. Really getting to the root of his workaholism.

[MJames]

here's some quick internet research.
I don't know how accurate it is, but there's some good stuff to work from.
1. ergomania
ergomania An obsessive zeal for or a compulsion to be constantly at work. The correct term for over work instead of the commonly used “workaholic“ which is etymologically wrong.

Workaholics feel the urge of being busy all the time, to the point that they often perform tasks that aren't required or necessary for project completion. As a result, they tend to be inefficient workers, since they focus on being busy, instead of focusing on being productive. In addition, workaholics tend to be less effective than other workers because it's difficult for them to be team players, they have trouble delegating or entrusting co-workers, or they take on so much that they aren't as organized as others.Furthermore, workaholics often suffer sleep deprivation which results in impaired brain and cognitive function.

Experts say the incessant work-related activity masks anxiety, low self-esteem, and intimacy problems. And as with addictions to alcohol, drugs or gambling, workaholics' denial and destructive behavior will persist despite feedback from loved ones or danger signs such as deteriorating relationships. Poor health is another warning sign.

Often the main causes of "workaholism or work addiction or Workaholic Tendencies" are more mental than physical. A bad relationship, poor self image, a history of abuse, stress, frustration and many other factors can change your overall attitude towards life which may directly impede your overall performance.

It is not the workplace that causes workaholism; it is the addict who seeks out the environment to feed his or her need for the adrenalin rush. Workaholics tend to seek out jobs that entail high-stress levels to feed their addiction.
However, the root cause of this addiction may be traced back to childhood. Just as drug addiction or alcoholism is closely linked to the family environment, so is workaholism. Dr. Robinson explains:

[Workaholics] tend to be products of what I call ‘looking good families’ whose parents tend to be perfectionists and expect unreasonable success from their kids. These children grow up thinking that nothing is ever good enough. Some just throw in the towel, but others say, ‘I’m going to show I’m the best in everything so [my] parents approve of me.’”
Unfortunately, the quest for the ultimate perfection is what makes people susceptible to workaholism as perfection itself is unattainable.

Effects of Workaholism:
Excessive working tendency impels secretions of brain chemicals that overloads the system and makes intoxicated. The sense of self-importance in workaholics is a result of their impaired thinking. This impaired thinking comes from intoxication and intoxication is a result of constant anxiety triggered by secret fear. It's a vicious circle and workaholics are caught in the middle of it.
Some experts believe workaholics are addicted to the adrenalin rush. Adrenalin, also called epinephrine, is a hormone and a neurotransmitter. It plays a major role during short-term stress situations and has a major evolutionary role – it enables animals to flee from or fight a threatening enemy, thus earning it the name “flight or fight” hormone. In these emergency situations, adrenalin pumps up the supply of oxygen and glucose to the brain and voluntary muscles, increases heart rate but suppresses bodily processes not essential for the emergency. Thus, adrenalin rush on the short-term is advantageous. On the long-term, however, stress hormones like adrenalin can be detrimental to our health.

How to deal with workaholism

Know whether you have a problem. The first step is knowing and accepting that you have a problem. Like most addicts, workaholics are also prone to denial. Take a good look at yourself, your lifestyle and your working habits. Take an anonymous online test to determine whether you are suffering from workaholism.

Seek professional help. Addicts need professional help. It need not be a shrink. Life and career coaches can also give advice on finding life-work balance. Some companies provide coaching services to employees. Coaches may be in-company or external. In most cases, coaches and psychiatrists are required to keep client/patient/employee confidentiality even if the employers pay for their services.

Find a support group. The Workaholics Anonymous is a group where workaholics can run to for support. Many people might find it ridiculous to liken workaholism to alcoholism. However, support groups, no matter how they are called, have always been proven to be effective in providing help, be it in losing weight, recovering from a disease, or fighting addiction.


I've italicized the points I think may be pertinent.for instance,
if his disorder makes him ineffective as a team player , perhaps he
was once a member of a JLA/Avengers type group, but quit or was
outcast. this could be the support group he needs to get better.
how does he get back there? what's his secret fear?
the adrenalin rush, intoxication and sleep deprivation could really
push this guy over the edge!
ok, just some ideas to riff on...

[Ugga Bugga]

This is perfect and right on target.

I am going to try to pluck the elements of this in which thematic premise can be developed. I am going to use the LEADS TO TOOL to do this

ERGOMANIA leads to "BUSY WORK" rather than "REAL WORK" which leads to inefficiency (boring, but I'm brainstorming with myself, so I won't judge"

ERGOMANIA leads to self-centredness which leads to failure within a team or disruption of team dynamics. (again, I shouldn't judge, but this seems a like something I wouldn't be that interested in but brainstorming is just putting ideas, no matter how dumb out there.

ERGOMANIA leads to inability to delegate which leads to exhaustion and inefficiency

ERGOMANIA leads to using work to generate adreniline to release endorphines, rather than living life to it's fullest to release endorphines. (From this one we can develop a psychological need. Our hero needs to learn to live life, experience real adreniline rushes. In essense, he needs to start living life)

Anyone else have ideas?


Anyone else have some ideas, I am just throwing things out there.

[Ugga Bugga]

Okay, since no one piped in. Let's put this to the extreme.

Let's figure out ways that Ergomania - workoholicism can hurt our hero's loved ones. We want it to be severe hurt. This is switching from a psychological flaw to a moral flaw. This is ruining lives here. Not just his own, but the lives of other people in his life. He is detrminentally affected the lives of others. He must must must change or ultimately he will meet his demise. Let's kick things up a notch. Any suggestions?

[scmarooney]

Interesting stuff, so far, Ugga, and everyone else who has chimed in!

Here's some thoughts to add to the mix: I think if this Hero who has/suffers from ergomania it would probably result in him becoming the Superhero persona at ALL times. He has abandoned his civilian or secret-identity and is constantly at "work" against the forces of evil/crime or whatever, and probably doing a pretty poor job of it which is making him even more miserable and even more obsessive and determined to up the ante in his war on evil/crime.

Those who care about the hero, in his private life suffer because of his lack in their lives. If he has a girlfriend or wife they don't see him and aren't getting any monetary support or help in their lives in addition to his not being around. This might mean his significant-other is facing foreclosure or another looming monetary crisis. His children (if he has any) would suffer in a similar fashion. Any friends and more distant relatives would notice how he has disappeared from the scene, become more withdrawn and invisible.

The Hero's Ergomania has possibly made him callous and unkind, perhaps even emotionally-abusive to those he cares most for, as he might see them as a distraction to his overarching goal of ending crime in the city or defeating Dr. Evil and his minions.

[Ugga Bugga]

fantastic....great stuff.

Here is part of the template that I am developing here. I will expand on this later. but for now, here is where we are at.

The hero has a flaw

The flaw is caused by an open wound from the past that needs to be reconciled

The flaw is the source of major personal problems

An even occurs that creates a desire. The hero wants something, and he wants something really bad

New pieces of information are revealed throughout the story that change and intensify the desire (The stakes are raised)

Until and unless the flaw is addressed, the hero will be unable to solve his personal problems AND will be unable to reach his desire

The story events attack the hero's flaw to it's very core, forcing him to either change or die

The stubborn hero, has enablers that provide temptation to prevent the hero from changing

There is a mentor or mentors that embody the very theme of the story. The mentor provides advice for a better life, and advice for achieving the desire.

The mentor's advice is resisted until the hero hits rock bottom

Once the hero wholeheartedly accepts the mentor's advice, and applies it, he has the necessary skills to obtain his desire. If the hero never accepts it, he had the necessary skills to obtain his desire, but it is a tragedy that he never learned what he needed to learn

Assuming the hero applied the advice, he achieves his desire, and now has mastered his world. He returns to a new equilibrium

[Ugga Bugga]

One of the things about plotting out a story, is that you go from a blank page, which represents the infinite possibilities but also represents no progress whatsoever. The key to actually making it through story creation, is committing to the specific story that you want to tell from all of the possibilities that exist.

By creating the flaw, we have narrowed the number of possible stories to tell from infinite, to a number that is so huge, my brain cannot even fathom it.

Now we need to refine some more. Let's really figure out what our story is truly about. We have an ergomaniac who is hurting his family, and miserable. Great start. He has a flaw, that not only screws up his own life, it has a profound effect on others.

Now we need to develop the fix. What is it that our hero is going to need to change in order to improve his life. This is where the beginnings of your theme comes in.

Let me give you some examples.

A workaholic who has lost touch with the worth and joy of family, will have a really different adventure than a workaholic that needs to stop micromanaging and trust in his teammates to get the job done.

Both are legitimate story bases. I can envision entertaining stories for both, BUT but both will have profoundly different stories. Both will need different support and adverse characters. The desire of the hero will be different. The lessons learned will be different.

So, let's answer this question.

In order to lead a better, happier and more successful life our workoholic, ergomaniac hero needs __________________________________________________ _____________ (to learn.......... to start.......... to stop............ to do............................).

[Ugga Bugga]

Okay, maybe I scared people off, let's keep this simple.

Let's choose from the following

In order to lead a better life, our Workaholic, Ergomaniac hero must

A. learn that family is fragile, and no amount of money can replace them.
B. learn to trust his team members. Not everything needs to be his responsibility
C. learn that his own self worth, is not connected to monetary gain, but rather the quality of his relationships.
D. learn that perfection is impossible, and holding oneself to an impossible standard guarantees failure

There are infinite ways to go. Any thoughts on which one, or one of your own, you would like this story to develop?

[The P.R. Man]

I'm good with C. learn that his own self worth, is not connected to monetary gain, but rather the quality of his relationships.

he goes from his workaholic, proactive role in hunting down the villens before they strike, or patrolling space for alien threats,
to a more reactive lets stop that mugging across the street or evacuate that burning apartment

he's working with the other superheros in the proactive department and delegating, rather than making it a one man show while ignoring any of their assistance or efforts.

maybe a mixture of B and C then?

[Ugga Bugga]

Thanks P.R. - I'm struggling a bit with the monetary gain thing though, and how it melds with delegation. Let me think out loud.

His priorities are important. Doing the work he does is important - it must get done.
However his approach causes inefficiency, because he is a miserable martyr.
He has a team, and is not using it.
His family suffers
He must learn that he cannot be everything to everybody all the time
He must learn that enhancing family relationships will actually improve his work, reduce his stress and burnout.

I would think monetary gain is not really driving him, rather, desire to get the job done.

Thoughts?

[addingtron]

I think D is the answer with the most profound implications for the hero, and thereby lends itself to the most interesting story arc... I think C is a bit boring..

Since it seems like the hero having a father/mother/role-model who was a perfect example of all things super-heroic is now a definite, and also that that figure was killed in the line of duty, I think that the hero learning that it was the struggle for perfection that got his parent figure killed would be just the kind of thing that would lead a hero to real self-discovery.

This kind of dovetails with the idea that part of the reason the hero is such a ergomaniac is because he is trying to live up to an impossible standard set by an aloof parent. Ultimately the hero can also realize that it was the parent figure's constant perfection in that figure's work that lead the parent figure to be a completely worthless parent.

Going way out on a limb here (and way farther out than the planning calls for, but when you're feeling it, you're feeling it), but maybe what killed the parent could reappear, and as the hero prepares to confront that menace, he can come across a diary, or a recording or something left by his parent while he is researching how to fight the threat. That diary could either be some kind of confession of weakness or regret about their parenting or it could be something that shows what a callous prick the parent was. And in that the hero could see how he is destroying his own family in the same way.

One more idea, and I'm really just writing these to have them down, but I think as influences (particularly negative) were mentioned earlier, the hero could have a compatriot who has no ties to anything, and is maybe a bit of a misanthrope as well, and that person could always be urging him to go out and fight crime/kick butts/etc. That person could also be much more brutal than the hero.

This is really enjoyable, I hope I can make some more contributions as it gets going.

[Ugga Bugga]

thanks for your input addingtron.

1. I think that this is focussing in, a little bit better. I personally like to choose a single strand, so that it is clear what the story is about. With a seemingly perfect parent, and the fact that we know that he works like a maniac to try to reach perfectionm it does seem the perfect fit. If there are no objections, I think we should go with this as the thematic premise.

2. With respect to the diary, or recording of regret from the parent. I am glad that you are finding this inspiring. Later on, we will be developing a mentor or mentors. Someone or something that in combination, drives home the message. that perfection is impossible, and holding oneself to an impossible standard guarantees failure. I sort of view this like Simba seeing his reflection in the river, and realizing that he is his father, and he needs to stop running away from his responsibilites. A diary or recording would be a nice touch, when our hero reaches rock bottom. Let's keep this in mind when we are working through story points.

3. With respect to the compatriot who has no ties to anything, is always be urging him to go out and fight crime/kick butts/etc. This is a really interesting idea. For a while, I was using Dramatica software. It was useful, but for me, often confusion. One the most useful things that came out of using it for me was learning about what they call the Contagonist. The contagonist is a character, whose function it is to distract the hero from making the changes that he needs to make. The contagonist is the great story lengthener, because once the hero accepts the message of the mentor, then the story will come to a conclusion.

When we develop characters to populate our story, we will deal with that.

For the sake of moving this along let's go with the perfectionism theme. Holding oneself to an impossible standard of perfectionism will lead to failure.

[Ugga Bugga]

let's now develop this a little bit further. I would like to brainstorm 10 different opinions people might have about holding oneself to the standard of perfectionism. They will probably be similar, but we can assign these different attitudes to different characters. It can be expressed as a statement, or dialogue a character might say, that has the attitude imbedded in it.

I will start

1. I do good work, but realize that I cannot be perfect, and that is okay.

[The P.R. Man]

2. "I can't be sure that anyone else is as commited to the cause as I am. so therefore I have to take the entire burdan myself. I can't trust anyone else to handle this work"

maybe trust issues are the root cause of the workaholism, he discovered erlier in his career that his father wasn't quite the hero he grew up idolizing, and it's developed into a real problem, doesn't trust his teammates to be competent, doesn't trust his wife to understand the stress he's under, doesn't even trust his own judgement, so he overcompensates by overworking.

hope I'm not derailing anything, just had a thought,

[Favorite-N]

3. I can't even think about beginning a new project or taking on more work until I am satisfied with the end results of the original problem.

It might be too much of a flaw because in this scenario I imagine that he wouldn't be able to save people because he wouldn't be able to prioritize his issues. He finds a fire. So he begins to fight the fire, someone jumps out of the building, but he can't stop fighting the fire...not sure.

[Ugga Bugga]

4. Perfect? I wear velcro shoes because I don't even know how to tie laces properly

[Ugga Bugga]

don't worry about derailing. This is a brainstorm. We will pick through what works later.

[Ugga Bugga]

5. There is no room for error. Error would have catstrophic and unfixable results.

[MJames]

6. " I can't take on this challenge right now.
I am not prepared or good enough yet, the results would be
mediocre."

the protagonist's goal of perfection may lead to obsessive and
intense training methods and procrastination/avoidance

when confronted with the possibility of less than perfect
results.

[Ugga Bugga]

7. Mistakes are important for growth.

[addingtron]

8. Perfection is an attainable and realistic goal, it is simply my own imperfection/weakness that prevents me from attaining it.

[Ugga Bugga]

8. Perfection is an attainable and realistic goal, it is simply my own imperfection/weakness that prevents me from attaining it.

Nice. .............

[Ugga Bugga]

9. Imperfection is what makes life unique and interesting.

[Ugga Bugga]

I, not being a perfectionist, am happy to keep it at 9. What I am trying to do here, is illustrate that there are infinite viewpoints. We will assign various viewpoints to different characters, as the story moves forward.

Let me summarize what we have so far

-We have a workaholic, ergomaniac son of a dead hero, who could do no wrong.
-The hero is trying to live up to the standard his father set. The standard of perfection.
-He works to no end. He is burning the candle at both ends, and possibly is even getting sick from exhaustion
-He is hurting his family, emotionally, economically,
-He is alienating co-workers/or co-heroes


Over the course of his story, he needs to learn something about holding oneself to an impossible standard. I think, specifically that attaining perfection is impossible . . . and if that is that standard by which you judge yourself, you are doomed to fail. Work hard, work as a team, learn from mistakes, and allow other's strengths to make up for your weaknesses, and together, you can accomplish anything...

Does anyone want to add or refine anything from here?

[WILLETT]

S'up Uggs. Just an idea: Could there be another angle to possibly explore with regards to the Media/Celebrity worship that adds even more pressure? Its quite relevant in todays society that this intense focus occurs to even minor celebrities, so it would seem quite natural to explore it, even slightly

[Ugga Bugga]

Crap, I typed a long answer which got lost somewhere.
I will summarize.

In our story, the celebrity driven media can act to distract our hero from attaining his goal. Just as we think the hero might chill, relax, let his teammates do their thing, expectations are heaped on our hero by the media, and he falls back into his old, self-destructive patterns. That would work quite well.

Perhaps, we have an unscrupulous media mogul, a Ted Turner type that knows all the right buttons to push with our hero. By treating him as a celebrity, the mogul knows that the hero will buckle under pressure, because he knows him well, The media mogul knows that at 100% the hero defeats the bad guys, and there are no ratings (like back when our hero's father easily vanquished crime). The media mogul is pushing all of the hero's buttons, for the very reason that he wants him to fail, or at least be less successful, to drag out ratings grabbing stories. Every time our hero gets close to figuring out what he needs to do, our media mogul puts the exact pressure on the hero, that tempts him to fall into old patterns, causing him to become ineffective.

Does that make sense? Sound good? What you were talking about?

[WILLETT]

Perfect! Putting across himself as 'The voice of the People', while chasing his own personal goals may be a quite magnificent angle. Could this person tie into the death of the parent-figure, or were you thinking of a Doomsday type threat?

[addingtron]

Hmmm.... Said media mogul could even be a former associate of the dead father's, who by goading the hero into ever more perilous deeds in which he must occasionally fail, acts as a continuing reminder of the father's disappointment in the son.

Maybe? This is strictly subtextual. Maybe we need you to put us back on course, Ugga.

[Ugga Bugga]

Perfect! Putting across himself as 'The voice of the People', while chasing his own personal goals may be a quite magnificent angle. Could this person tie into the death of the parent-figure, or were you thinking of a Doomsday type threat?

He absolutely ties into the death of the father. The father was really good at what he did. Solved every crime. Righted every wrong. Every day was a slow news day when Dad was around.

[Ugga Bugga]

Hmmm.... Said media mogul could even be a former associate of the dead father's, who by goading the hero into ever more perilous deeds in which he must occasionally fail, acts as a continuing reminder of the father's disappointment in the son.

Maybe? This is strictly subtextual. Maybe we need you to put us back on course, Ugga.

I was thinking either a former associate, or maybe a brother (uncle to our hero).


The bottom line, if this guy is our antogonist. He must challenge our hero to his core, so that he needs to overcome the weakness or die.

[Ugga Bugga]

We have spent a lot of time talking about our hero's liabilities. Let's figure out assets. These can be powers, abilities,

If our hero overcomes his weakness, but still does not have the ability to achieve his desire, the whole story is useless. What skills, abilities, powers, alliances, friends, and other assets does the hero have?

[addingtron]

Accelerated speed, enhanced strength/durability, flight?

Do we want him to be a typical Superman-style hero, or something a little more original?

What about the ability to detect electrical impulses, like sharks are purported to possess? Or a limited ability to influence the arrangement of molecules within a certain distance of him. So while he couldn't turn lead to gold, he could make a river turn into a wall of water. This could be how he can manage super strength/durability and flight right there, actually. I dunno how you could get speed out of it, though.

[Ugga Bugga]

It doesn't matter to me. Original is good.

Ability to detect electrical impulses is good.
Limited ability to influence arrangement of molecules is good.

To really impact here though - I think we need abilities that ties into the need for change. Something that can add to the symbolism of the story.

I sort of like the limited ability to influence molecules. He has been trying his lifetime to turn coal into the perfect gem, the diamond, but no matter what he does he cannot do it. He is imperfect, and striving to be perfect. He wrongly believes if he can figure out this trick, he has it made. But all he has is a lump of coal.

In the end, he has to stop the futile act of trying to make the diamonds, and actually use the coal. Coal is good, coal is useful, coal has purpose. It's not the perfect element, like diamond. If you spend your entire life trying to turn coal into diamonds, you will waste an awful lot of coal.

[addingtron]

Maybe if in extreme circumstances his molecular manipulation can be significantly extended, (e.g. going super-saiyan) he could do something like rearrange the ionosphere as a shield against an interstellar threat.

What about the ability to organize his skin cells into some kind armor like substance. Or he could clad himself in nitrogen particles from the air.

I don't know if a possible career has come up for our hero yet, but I think a chemist wouldnt be a bad idea. Plus, that could be an excellent source for possible antagonists.

[Ugga Bugga]

chemist works. We would want to make sure we aren't travelling down a Breaking Bad route, but I think it would be safe to use chemist and treat new story territory.

I'm thinking that he does not have the superpowers to start, but makes a choice to enhance himself, because he thinks that it will make him more perfect, better and stronger.

[Ugga Bugga]

Okay, here is what I would like to do now.

The basic template that I want to use for this story is the one that is proposed by Christopher Vogler's wonderful book the Hero's Journey,

The basic template is as follows.

1. Heroes are introduced in the ORDINARY WORLD where
2. they receive the CALL TO ADVENTURE
3. They are RELUCTANT at first or REFUSE THE CALL, but
4. are encourage by the MENTOR to
5. CROSS THE FIRST THRESHOLD and enter the Special World where
6. they encounter TESTS, ALLIES, AND ENEMIES
7. They APPROACH THE INMOST CAVE, crossing a second threshold
8. Where they endure THE ORDEAL
9. They take posession of the REWARD AND
10. are pursued on THE ROAD BACK to the ORDINARY WORLD.
11. They cross the third threshold, experience a RESURRECTION, and are transformed by the experience.
12. They RETURN WITH THE ELIXIR, a boon or treasure to benefit the Ordinary World.


So let's start developing our story. What I propose is that we do this in parts. Our first aim is to ultimately produce a 10 page script that sets out events to the crossing of the first threshold. If successful, we can decide to continue on from there. If not, we can do something else.

Let's start with Step One
OUR HERO IS FOUND IN THE ORDINARY WORLD.

A. We want our ordinary world to be a sharp contrast to the World of Adventure.

So let's brainstorm ideas here. What is the ordinary world of a perfectionist chemist who is hurting himself and his family with his perfectionism like, and how does it contrast with the world he will enter to solve his perfectionism, (among other things).

[Donnstar]

Okay, here is what I would like to do now.

The basic template that I want to use for this story is the one that is proposed by Christopher Vogler's wonderful book the Hero's Journey,

The basic template is as follows.

1. Heroes are introduced in the ORDINARY WORLD where
2. they receive the CALL TO ADVENTURE
3. They are RELUCTANT at first or REFUSE THE CALL, but
4. are encourage by the MENTOR to
5. CROSS THE FIRST THRESHOLD and enter the Special World where
6. they encounter TESTS, ALLIES, AND ENEMIES
7. They APPROACH THE INMOST CAVE, crossing a second threshold
8. Where they endure THE ORDEAL
9. They take posession of the REWARD AND
10. are pursued on THE ROAD BACK to the ORDINARY WORLD.
11. They cross the third threshold, experience a RESURRECTION, and are transformed by the experience.
12. They RETURN WITH THE ELIXIR, a boon or treasure to benefit the Ordinary World.


So let's start developing our story. What I propose is that we do this in parts. Our first aim is to ultimately produce a 10 page script that sets out events to the crossing of the first threshold. If successful, we can decide to continue on from there. If not, we can do something else.

Let's start with Step One
OUR HERO IS FOUND IN THE ORDINARY WORLD.

A. We want our ordinary world to be a sharp contrast to the World of Adventure.

So let's brainstorm ideas here. What is the ordinary world of a perfectionist chemist who is hurting himself and his family with his perfectionism like, and how does it contrast with the world he will enter to solve his perfectionism, (among other things).

Are you kidding me? didn't they just do a Hollywood movie about this? Must we emulate silicone-blonde-valley-hollywood?

Let's think of something better.

[The P.R. Man]

they've done quite a few movies about this, as did many writers from the past couple Millennium

it's been used becouse it works, but if you've got a better idea, feel free to throw it out there,

[Ugga Bugga]

Are you kidding me? didn't they just do a Hollywood movie about this? Must we emulate silicone-blonde-valley-hollywood?

Let's think of something better.

Of course you've seen a hollywood movie about this. All successful hollywood movies, all successful comics, religious stories, in fact all successful stories have these elements in them. This approach is found in literature, plays, cave drawings, it simply is the backbone of storytelling. Without it, you have no story, rather series of unconnected events.

Shakespeare uses this approach, If you want a debate about the merits of a mythic approach, please start a separate thread, and we can have that discussion. However, as this is my thread, I don't want it getting railroaded in debate about the approach of mythic structure. Suffice it to say that I believe that this is a great approach to create fantastically creative and unique stories, that have emotional resonance with an audience. Debate and discussion closed.

Now please, What elements of the ordinary world would a perfectionist chemist who is hurting himself and his family with his perfectionism like, and how does it contrast with the world he will enter to solve his perfectionism, (among other things).

[Guru_George]

Lighten up :D
Yeah going to scare the newbies off.

[Ugga Bugga]

Lighten up :D
Yeah going to scare the newbies off.

You're right George. I just want to stay on track.

[Ugga Bugga]

http://www.penciljack.com/forum/showthread.php?111906-The-merit-demerit-of-story-templates.&p=1250697#post1250697 for those who want to take up the discussion of story templates.

[addingtron]

Ugga, hope I'm reading you right here, but this is just some on-the-fly stuff.

Protagonist has a wife and two children. One child is an overachiever, top marks and all that. The other is conventionally troubled, into drugs and hanging out with the wrong crowd. The overachiever is following his father's footsteps seeking positive attention, the loser is seeking negative attention, both aren't getting it.

He has a job and he's well respected in his field. In fact, he is a pioneer in chemical applications research. Nobody thinks he's a stereotypical crackpot, or a mad scientist, or anything like that. His colleagues admire him for his dedication. They applaud him in his triumphs and sympathize with his failures. This would be in contrast to when he becomes a superhero; when he has his greatest successes most people never even notice him, and when he fails he is a pariah, and he's always the target of demagogues.

[Ugga Bugga]

Exactly on track...... I'll comment more tomorrow.

[Ugga Bugga]

Ugga, hope I'm reading you right here, but this is just some on-the-fly stuff.

Protagonist has a wife and two children. One child is an overachiever, top marks and all that. The other is conventionally troubled, into drugs and hanging out with the wrong crowd. The overachiever is following his father's footsteps seeking positive attention, the loser is seeking negative attention, both aren't getting it.

He has a job and he's well respected in his field. In fact, he is a pioneer in chemical applications research. Nobody thinks he's a stereotypical crackpot, or a mad scientist, or anything like that. His colleagues admire him for his dedication. They applaud him in his triumphs and sympathize with his failures. This would be in contrast to when he becomes a superhero; when he has his greatest successes most people never even notice him, and when he fails he is a pariah, and he's always the target of demagogues.

I would just say here, that they may admire him for his dedication, but his colleagues, are also feeling the brunt of his perfectionism

[Ugga Bugga]

Okay next lets work on

2. they receive the CALL TO ADVENTURE
3. They are RELUCTANT at first or REFUSE THE CALL, but
4. are encourage by the MENTOR to

Note that step 3 is not essential. Some hero's (Luke Skywalker) could not wait to go on the adventure, though others were reluctant and tried to prevent him from going. Out.

a. what is the call to adventure
b. do they refuse the call somehow
c. who is the mentor
d. how does the mentor encourage them.

[necenarro]

I just found this thread-- Sorry if I take it off track a bit...

I thought the angle was the Hero out away from family fighting crime too much? I don't think a chemist would really have time to fight crime. Unless our hero is only a scientist and this isn't a superhero comic? He should have a job that he can do easily or hide from.

Also, the father being "the perfect hero" to live up to is a good idea, but early in the thread the great idea of Father & Mother being perfect heroes was said. What if family problems come up because his wife isn't like his mother, or stops being a hero to raise kids? Could be a slow breakdown of his ideology of perfect.

[Ugga Bugga]

well, what we want is a scenario where the hero is perfectionist in his real world. This causes him problems in his ordinary world. There is an inciting incident of some sort where (Like the obtaining of powers, or somesuch), and perhaps a villain that must be destroyed, that will force him to deal with this head on.

I don't care if he is a chemist. However a chemist does work, because he has special skills and abilities (see Breaking Bad).

If we are going to go the route of earlier in the thread, then his ordinary world can be that of a superhero crimefighter within a crimefighting institution.

Doesn't matter to me.