Batman Pages - WIP

[VicM]

Just starting this thread in order to keep track, show progress, and get feedback on a current batch of samples I'm doing in preparation for a con at the end of the month. I'm working on a 7 page Batman story. I'll be inking these pages also, so line widths and final shadows haven't been worked out yet. I'm hoping my pencils will be closer to the stuff I do when I'm not under the pressure of working on an actual story page once I get a few pages in.

Be awesome and give me any feedback you have concerning the pages.

Here's page one (no Batman... yet!)

http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/page1-pencils.jpg

It's not entirely finished and the pencils won't get too much tighter than this since I'm inking these.

I'm going to make some changes on this page.

Panel 3 - ended up being too zoomed out for my tastes and different than my thumbnail version. I'm still going to show where everything is in relation to each other in the room (the most important parts being the door and the baby crib).

Panel 5 - I'm going to reverse the view point, using a larger silhouette of the door and the man to frame the reaction of the woman.

[VicM]

Newest update, as of last night.

Page 2 calls for a splash page of Batman using a throw line to swing thru the city. Pretty typical. After working out many thumbnail possibilities, here's the winner... Only thing is, I drew this a bit larger than needed and am trying to get an idea of which cropping option is the best. Let me know what you think.

Page 2 thumbnails. Different crops. What would jesus do?

Thumb A
http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/page2-thumbA.jpg

Thumb B
http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/Page2-ThumbB.jpg

Thumb D
http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/Page2-ThumbD.jpg

That's right, there's no Thumbnail C. Well there is, but I eliminated it.

...Andddd, just incase you can't figure out my scribbles up above ( I think they're decent), here's a colour comp that seperates all the elements. Plus I just wanted to post it.

http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/PAge2-ThumbColourComp.jpg

Thanks!

[VicM]

Page 3 pencils. Skipped page two to finish this one first.

http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/Page3-Pencils.jpg

[Cassu]

You say these pages are for a Con, are they for a portfolio review? I only ask because usually editors want to see pencilled work if you want to be a penciller, they won't really care for inked with unless it's been inked by a pro inker. They want to see your use of pencils including line widths.

Loving the pencils on page 3 although I'd love to see some more detail in them, the third last panel in page 3 of the ladie's legs seems a little bland. Maybe a little bit of texture of the ground think about the various textures surrounding the characters. i.e. if she laying in carpet, asphalt, etc. etc. You have a great knack for drawing Batman's face, he looks great.

[VicM]

Thanks for taking a look Cassu. I see the point about pencils vs inks when you're trying to get into the industry, but for the art I like and the artists I like, inking myself is the only option. It's where most of the work is done on my pages. Also I'm not limiting myself to just the big two, I'm talking about the smaller companies and indy creators also.

Glad you're digging page 3. You've got a great point about the texture of the ground, I'll see what I can do there. Thanks!

[Symson]

Be sure to make photo copies of your pencils and show them alongside your inks.

[alfred183]

VIM! This stuff is looking FANTASTIC!! I completely dig your backgrounds and it looks like the pages will have a great feel! Take the finishes slow and don't rush. Nice and easy. I will keep checking back on this and see how the progress is going. My only real recommendation is to not ink over the original so you have that show as well and so that you can print more if you mess up or need to redo the inking for other reasons.

Cheering you on, man!! Go! Go!

[VicM]

Symson - Thanks man, good tip.

ALF! - Thanks bro! I'm still a bit underwhelmed with how certain panels are turning out, but I feel like I'm getting closer to where I want to be on others. The inks will add alot and I think I'm going to have to ink directly on the board, it's just the best way for me to work. Thanks for the encouragement and definitely chime in with any crits that can help the pages.

[Cassu]

To be honest I can't discourage you enough to not ink directly onto the board, unless you take copies of your pencils first. Yes it may help you get a job at an indy place that wants you to both pencil and ink but any major company will not look at inks unless you actually want to be an inker. (And then they ask you to bring a portfolio of inks over the work of pros so the flaws of the pencils don't make your inks look bad.) I only say this because my portfolio is full of old work I've done where I've both pencilled and inked and done so directly over my pencils. Although both is my own work no editor or talent agency will look at them because they don't showcase my pencils and I want to be a penciller. I'm having to re-do my entire portfolio as a result.

Just don't want the same thing happening to you.

[VicM]

Final pencils for the 3 pages I did right here. Got some great feedback and made some amazing contacts at the con. Been lazy to scan them in, but finally did. On to the next samples.

Page 1
http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/VicM-Page1-FinalPencils-net.jpg

Page 2
http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/VicM-Page2-FinalPencils-net.jpg

Page 3
http://i481.photobucket.com/albums/rr172/VIM22/VicM-Page3-pencils-net.jpg

[mikeljanin]

Hey, Vim, this is a good stuff. Love that last page. On first panel the background is great, but the foreground building need a little more work, since the windows are different and its perspective goes in a different way than the other buildings. On panels 3 and 5 you should work on create a more convincing environment. The room is huge, looks more like a living room than a baby room, and the distance of it from the camera you've choosen makes it even bigger. The crib is huge too, and inconsistent with next panel. Panel 5 is better, but still looks like a huge room. On page 2 panel 1 definitely needs more work. Panels 2, 4 and 5 are ok for me. Great job on Batman face. Panel 3 looks weird, with the half body behind Batman. I would vary Batman's angle, more bird view, bringing his head near the camera. Page 3, I like it a lot. Great done here.
About submissions, both big and small companies want to see your best. In this job there's no room to choose if you are going to ink or not your pencils. Just work a lot to improve and be good enough. This pages show a good start for it.

[VicM]

Hey, Vim, this is a good stuff. Love that last page. On first panel the background is great, but the foreground building need a little more work, since the windows are different and its perspective goes in a different way than the other buildings. On panels 3 and 5 you should work on create a more convincing environment. The room is huge, looks more like a living room than a baby room, and the distance of it from the camera you've choosen makes it even bigger. The crib is huge too, and inconsistent with next panel. Panel 5 is better, but still looks like a huge room. On page 2 panel 1 definitely needs more work. Panels 2, 4 and 5 are ok for me. Great job on Batman face. Panel 3 looks weird, with the half body behind Batman. I would vary Batman's angle, more bird view, bringing his head near the camera. Page 3, I like it a lot. Great done here.
About submissions, both big and small companies want to see your best. In this job there's no room to choose if you are going to ink or not your pencils. Just work a lot to improve and be good enough. This pages show a good start for it.

Thanks! You're spot on about the depth and size issues in the first two pages. There's a hell of alot I'd change about the first two pages. I've already started on some new samples, and had a bit of a hard time looking at these pages now, since I see so many flaws. But progress is progress.